<xCytheriAx> imagine losing your entire arm from a shark attack.. eek, that poor girl <BluECliQ> thats a shame.. <xCytheriAx> she said how she believes God has a plan for her and doesn't think it's for her to get bitten by a shark twice <BluECliQ> she might not get bit twice but if she falls off the board i cant imagine her swiming to shore with only one arm
* Spanky-G has parts of the old testament in his lungs <Angel``> ?? <Spanky-G> I ran out of cigarette paper...
<Kublah> stealing from drug dealers is like takin candy from a well armed baby
<Edofnor> #1 pickup line of all time: "Hey, does this rag smell like chloroform to you?
<DRLEGO> OH THAT FUCKING IDIOT <DRLEGO> my gf bought me a xmas gift <DRLEGO> off amazon <DRLEGO> but she used my account to do it <DRLEGO> so it charged ME <tuffguy> haha <tuffguy> owned
* Solid_Snake has quit IRC (Read error: Operation timed out) <+an1me> NO, THIS ISN'T HAPPENING, SNAKE! SNAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAKE!#!# <@Master_Tang> rofl <Shaytan> LOL <Corellion> LOL
<%Hamtaro> I tried to register the AIM name "Your mother" <%Hamtaro> And got this <%Hamtaro> Create a Screen Name <%Hamtaro> <%Hamtaro> Sorry, Your mother is already in use
<ACAB> 1st time i delt with a dead body i had to remove all personal belongings and put the lady in a body bag when i was an intern at the hospital ER... i put on all her jewlery and got in trouble :( <baggle> That's some fucked up shit man <ACAB> i put on her wedding ring and was like "Sorry ladies, im taken"
<Potato> A couple years back, my friend had the greatest christmas tree of all time <Potato> We were 'round at his place, having a post-pissup drink/laugh at lightweight bastards and two cops came in because of a noise complaint <Potato> One of them walks towards the open back door while the other does the usual "Why are you making so much noise" question routine <Potato> The friend in question goes pale as he sees the cop stick his head in the door and only look one way before deciding they were wasting their time <Potato> When they'd fucked off, I asked him what was wrong, he pointed in the other direction and told me to go check out the christmas tree the cop missed <Potato> I stick my head in the door and lo, a 6 foot tall pot plant, complete with tinsel and presents around the base, is sitting in the corner, facing me off, taunting me, goin' "Yeah, fucker, I'm a 6 foot tall pot plant. Ya wanna piece of me, bitch?"
<+ XmasCola> "this screener has been electronically coded to assist in tracking illegal duplications. unothorized duplication of this screener is stricly forbidden." <+ XmasCola> "if you copied it, we know who did it, so you might as well just turn yourselves in and then we won't punish you as bad" <+ XmasCola> "we swear we're not bluffing" <+ XmasCola> "we saw hackers"
<pixistix> I like sending out messages in a bottle. <pixistix> But I'm creative. <pixistix> "I have been shipwrecked at sea, while bringing an important message." <pixistix> "Do not, under any circumstances, allow President Kennedy to go to Dallas"
<Aliya> Who is peer? <Roudi> No one can be... told what peer is. You have to be peered for yourself.
~ Carrotz: Question: In 'alice in wonderland', with what were the words 'eat me' written on the cake > Azrael: icing > Azrael: blood ~ rh|semiafk: arial > Azrael: rofl
* larra has joined #Hentai <larra> u people are terrible! <larra> my brother attacked our aunt becuae of hentai! * larra has left #Hentai
<Bl1tz|> lol I think Tatu arose out of a secret expiriment to log the average American's web search <Bl1tz|> and they came up with 'young teenage Russian lesbians'
Myke`: Bush's national security adviser is named Condoleezza Rice Myke`: wth kinda name is that? dodee: sounds like a mexican side dish.
<JuSTiNb> this old cleaning lady at burger king said she was gonna beat me with a broom
<Viper187> ok <Viper187> I don't like Alcohol <Viper187> fuckin auto-eject <Viper187> It read the Halo CD, then spit the CD back out at me <Viper187> causing the CD tray to knock my goddamn glass off the desk
<+[G-Prime]> Microsoft Aims for Software in Every Car <+[G-Prime]> Oh great <+[G-Prime]> Now our cars will crash <@Crucial> blue windshield of death
<Havard> I think baptizing babies is wrong. <Havard> I mean, they don't have a say in it. <ithil> Yeah, but what if they die and go to liiiimbo? <STL> Well, then their parents will have to go fuck with the Merovingian <ithil> In a terrible sequel to the Bible
<Ephialtes> ugh <Ephialtes> I. <Ephialtes> Am. <Ephialtes> Wet. <Ephialtes> infact I am BEYOND wet <Ephialtes> I am soaked <Ephialtes> no wait, I am beyond soaked <Ephialtes> I am drenched <Ephialtes> and I may be beyond that *** Ephialtes has been kicked off channel #ev3 by zambezi (flood)
<daem0n_> i got new car radio the other day, its pretty cool. you shout soul and it plays soul, you shout rock and it plays rock. the other day some kids ran past my car and i yelled "FUCKING KIDS" and it played michael jackson.
<CrackyMcZap> why don't we get a Straight Pride parade? <Kaejo> they're called gun & knife shows
<joshua_> C ECE DBRY AOT URP YDAY TCBE RU YRPYGP.! <joshua_> BRYDCBI CO ,RPYDF RU YDAY TCBE UR YRPYGP.! <joshua_> AaAAAAAAAAAAAAAACC.............................! <joshua_> AND FUCK YOU TOO MR. DVORAK
<Twinkle> Microsoft has just announced that their revolutionary new "Yboy" will weigh less than 10 pounds and be able to fit in a small backpack
<Fubar> Reminds me in class, when some teacher was going off on us about feminazi shit, she goes "A woman can do anything a man can!" and my friends goes "well you can't produce sperm!"
<@Serge`> LOL <@Lord_Saros> stfu you fuxing noob <@Lord_Saros> AOL kiddie ! <@Deadpool-> somone uses aol here? <@Lord_Saros> Sxales does <@Sxales> ha <@Deadpool-> you make me sick <@Lord_Saros> He just keeps his aol line on a low profile *@Sxales hides it under a rug <@Sxales> what? <@Lord_Saros> Nothing (: <@Sxales> i'm too fucking cheap to use aol, i just yell in binary real loud
<TeamGato-Mumbo> oh god, my cat is being eaten by racoons <TeamGato-Mumbo> brb
<Milo> the karma chameleon is gonna come by one day, give you a fatal illness, and then piss in your mouth
<jws> You just *know* you have a virus when you see this: <jws> (D:) Local Disk <jws> Total size: 66631337 GB
<barryk> Pillows: do you believe Iraq posed a direct threat to US homeland security ? <`dA> yes <`dA> iraq was an asshole <spikeb> and the us military was a giant penis
<magpie> why am I watching spice girls behind the music <magpie> am I that bored <jeff> you obviously need to spice up your life
The U.S. Government today changed its emblem from an eagle to a condom because it more accurately reflects the government's political stance. Condoms stand up to inflation, halt production, destroy the next generation, protect pricks, and give a sense of security while actually screwing you!
meg32185: you're weird meg32185: where do u think you can find wholesale socks on the internet?
<Xizer> Winzip is such a girl... <Xizer> "Uh hey. 30 days are up could you stop using me? No? Well I'll just ask again tomorrow..."
<goran> "I once said "owned" to a black man before. talk about awkward moment..."
<@Usama> I am gonna get a tattoo of a $100 bill on my penis.....because women like to blow money and I like to watch my money grow.
<fosheeze> i ate oatse for breakfast <BigBrother_> was that a typo of oats, or goatse? <BigBrother_> I'm hoping it was oats, or do you eat horribly disfigured anus?
<Gareth>: i was tryin to make a :S face in real life while at the doctors, and all these handicaps walked in while i was doing it <Gareth>: and they sat down next to me, and started stroking my head and stuff, saying, "friend, friend" <Gareth>: Thats When i Realised......... <Bill>: .......yes.......what did u realise <Gareth>: I Fucken realised there were a bunch of retards stroking my head!!!
-!- marlies [~m@81.132.2.190] has joined #gamesoc < marlies> ello all < Jops> welcome to the tumbleweed zone < kev> o. < kev> 'o < kev> `o < kev> o' < marlies> o, < kev> congratulations, you have won tonights star prize! -!- marlies [~m@81.132.2.190] has quit [Client Quit] < kev> freedom from irc
<r4v3n> there is just NO good excuse, if caught in my gfs room in the middle of the night <r4v3n> "hey mr c...was walking by your house and i dropped my penis...it fell into your daughter, but i've collected it now and will just be...on...my...way"
<+_chester_> i think the dentist might molest me while i'm under <@End11> and your dissapointed you can't be awake for it? <+_chester_> i want to see his technique <@Psybrid> lol <+_chester_> i mean, good god, if i need 4 days to recover, the guy is pulling more than teeth