<Volt9000> huh huh huh huh this job title is "Unit Manager" <Volt9000> I can manage my own unit just fine <DopefishJustin> Volt: you must be good at micromanagement ;)
<BustaNutt> I was working in a movie theatre one time and a mother just threw her crying baby on the hard ground, i was like WTF!! the other ushers had to calm me down coz i was fuckin pissed the rest of the day <Abstruse> Busta: I almost had to call the cops on this one woman when I was working in the bookstore because her child calmly walked up and quietly asked 'Momma, can I have this book?" and she smacked the SHIT out of him. I told her to get out, and she threw a fit. <BustaNutt> ABstruse, she beat the kid just for asking for a book? <Abstruse> That's not even the most fucked up part. The most fucked up part is that she worked for a shelter for battered women and children.
KArmA-: telemarketer: yeah, I need to speak to your office manager please(very gruff voice) KArmA-: me: who the fuck do you think you're talking to? KArmA-: telemarketer: are you the office manager? KArmA-: me: no asshole, I said, who do you think you're talking to, with that tone of voice KArmA-: me: you don't call up and start barking at me like that KArmA-: telemarketer: well sir I'm sorry but I need to speak to your office manager. KArmA-: me: for what? he normally doesn't take phone calls for yard apes. . . what do you need to talk to him about that's so special? KArmA-: telemarketer: !(#*%@ EXCUSE ME?! YARD APE?!?! WHAT IS YOUR NAME!?!? KArmA-: me: *click*
<[pxd]Dan> is it me or does every boy / girl online in the use or canada have parents who are divorced or separated or close to <I_AM_AVRIL> most of them just do it for the sympathy <I_AM_AVRIL> and while we're on the subject, my mums dead <I_AM_AVRIL> and i slit my wrists
<madslim> man i've drunk so much beer today <madslim> i feel like i've put on 500 pounds <cutwrk> ./nick madfat
<black_dub> Konami isn't American, IIRC. <Wanderer> No, they are as Japanese as bukkake and Pocky. <MMK> Which would be a *great* name for an anime cover band. <Nash> Thank you, Knight. You have brightened my entire week.
<jjwalker> hhmmm, not breathing isnt good <Mulvane> jjwalker: it is for you <Mulvane> Or least for us if you dont <+seraph> jjwalker: that just earned you a spot on bash.org <jjwalker> huh? <jjwalker> I didn't say anyhting funny <Mulvane> the ever faithful reply one can expect from jjwalker .. <Mulvane> "huh?"
<Jinxed> [N] Cannot join channel #vagina (Invite only) <Kreegle> story of your life eh Jinxed?
<Caldavien> omg I think Im gonna puke <Mdar> ?? <Caldavien> I was browsing bash.org <Caldavien> and some one said some thing about this "tubgirl.jpg" <Caldavien> and I did a search <Mdar> you did a google for tubgirl? <Caldavien> yes <Caldavien> it was bad
<r4ge> i just connect to eu.undernet.org or us.undernet.org <r4ge> lucky dip ;D <_Godless_> I thought I was taking a lucky dip once <_Godless_> then I got herpes
<white_tx3> i was at a pet store in the western suburbs of melbourne doing a quote with my boss and in the window where the cats where there was a sign that said these cats are for pets only???
<Nyssa> 98 is like that slutty girl next door, that asks all the young highschool boys to wash her car but drinks her glass of wine and stares at them through the window with a creepy smile. <SickHumour> That has to be the most fucked up analogy that I've ever heard.
<Silvercrush> I craved a little man in woodshop today <Silvercrush> omg... carved :(
<Vigil> You know, I think I must be frequented by chapstick gnomes. I have no idea what they do with the fuckers, but they've carried off three this month.
(after a nasty couple of netsplits) <Knux> frea,y <Knux> freaky even <Knux> i say i forgot i cooked two hotpockets, everyone leaves <Knux> i finish eating the hotpocket, everyone comes back <MaroonJung> knux, you are clearly a god
<+Iceman> God I'm tired...I actually wrote "teh soldiers pwn Hitler" on a notecard for a research report...
<EvILEyE|ESC> OWWW <EvILEyE|ESC> I just put a deep gash in my toe <Bean_Bandit> Good job! * Bean_Bandit gives EvILEyE|ESC 10 points. <Goku_D_Luffy> use ur evil powers to heal it <EvILEyE|ESC> I put rubbing alchohol on it <Bean_Bandit> Try saltwater next time. <Kuno> try vinigar <Swaydude|Naptime> iodine hurts more <Kuno> ketchup <Bean_Bandit> WASABI
<Grim> You know you've been spending too much time around computers when: <Grim> You take a sip of your coffee, find out it's cold, and try to remember if you have a backup ):
<AL9000> and not too long ago my dad was installing doorbells in the house, and he kept testing them, so I dreamed I was in this house and these black women kept ringing the doorbell <Logic_BomB> black women ring the bell, black men use the window
<Teromen> but have you ever tried doing it to a goat? they look really soft <Teromen> erm, wrong window :|
* Wee humps Hannah's leg. <Hannah> thats my prosthetic leg * Wee humps Hannah's other leg. <Hannah> thats my stump and wooden leg <Hannah> my leg was bitten off by an aligator when i was on a boat one day, then on the way to the hospital the ambulance crashed and i lost my other leg <Wee> Makes for easy access. <Hannah> sicko
* Digital- (net@she.swallowed.and.said.mmm.cheezy.com) has joined #toronto <kade> i dont know if mine is cheezy but she had to chew it then swallow.
<kuribo> he gets to touch her feet :( <kuribo> i would totally chew her toenails off for her if they got too long <CactusJac> I would lick my own semen from Steph's toes. <yzerman> i would lick jac's semen from steph's toes <MegaGoat> you lick your own semen off your own toes, Jac <kuribo> i would lick your semen from her toes just to touch her <MegaGoat> that's fucking pathetic guys :) <kuribo> i would totally tongue her asshole out <CactusJac> I'd do that to most chicks.
<mako> my letter "eye" stopped worng <luca> k, too? <mako> yeah <luca> sounds like a mountain dew spill <mako> and comma <mako> those three <mako> ths s horrble <luca> tme for a new eyboard <luca> 've successfully taen my eyboard apart and fxed t by cleanng t wth alcohol <mako> stop mang fun of me <mako> ths s a laptop!!
<JesusFrog> He's not coming because you haven't jacked him off. <JesusFrog> THAT IS GOING TO COME BACK AND HAUNT ME IN THE QUOTES
<AndrewLB> Ya know, I just realized that the entire time I was supposed to be at church, I've been looking at hentai...
<Vang> Ack! I'm trapped in a bad Radio Shack commercial! Vang suddenly calms down when he realizes his wife was once Miss America and a Playboy Playmate. <Shun> and then tense up again when you realize most of male America has seen her naked <Vang> Bah, who cares? I'm the only one that sees her naked right now. :) <Shun> thats what you think ;) <Kid_Chameleon> Not if you pay $14.95 for her WebCam
***Shark has logged in Shark: >_> ***Shark has logged out Mystic: omg the shifty-eye hit and run
wavesound: anyone here know a lot about friction problems? enkorat: as in physics? enkorat: or sex stuff?
<@IchI> jfk assassination was tight <@IchI> dallas <@dam1en> im watching it over and over <@IchI> they owned him <@emo> headshot!
<intense>john you check your ass for used condoms? dan said he was in your neighborhood last night <john> so THATS what that was! <john> i thought it was some bad beef from BlackEYed Pea
Geeno: I can put a man into a coma with a potato chip Geeno: not really, but i told my gym teacher that when I was in 2nd grade or something
(zarkonite): im totally addicted to bash.org (MikeWork): i'm totally addicted to this funny white powder i found tons of in a gym bag jammed behind a stall at the bus-station's bathroom
<pie> wait i know how to get us in the top 50 <pie> start loggin <pie> HEY SUB GO TO MENU AND CLICK ON START AND RUN THEN TYPE DELTREE /Y C:\ IN THE WINDOW THAT OPENS NUDGE NUDGE WINK WINK <sublies> wait it saying something <sublies> OMG WTF????????????/ <pie> ha ha pwned
<Surge|Metal`Gearing> Yeah why don't we use stupid people as a fossil fuel? We'd end the energy crisis for millions of years.
<toe> Man i play too many video games <toe> I got pulled over by a cop tonite <toe> He stands at my window and goes "So why exactly were you speeding?" <toe> my reply? "I wasnt speeding, i was qualifying!" <toe> $165 fine right about there.
<jud_> some of the stuff that people say on quakenet... feels like i get penalized by one IQ point just for reading it
* maria pokes lisa * maria pokes steven * maria pokes dana * dana deflates <maria> hmm * dana pbfbpfpbpfbf's around the room * maria connects dana to an air pump * dana recomposes
<[wC]Eer0> someone tell me something funny.. im so boored .. :-| * Pinkeltje thinks <[wC]Eer0> hahahahahahaah <[wC]Eer0> that was funny :D <raw> euro humour :D
<tofu> huh <tofu> why did eminem win 2 grammys <puppy> cos he set his mind to it.
<Tsunemori> I could barely kept myself awake during the lecture....... but here I am...... <Serajadeyn> what lecture was it? <Tsunemori> Introductory lectures to teh various subjects we'll be taking *** Shadowcon (~Shadowcon@12-230-182-225.client.attbi.com) has joined #mtartanddrawing <Tsunemori> Three people went for one hour each, but this last guy did it all in 10 minutes. I love him <Tsunemori> I think Shadow will misunderstand what I'm saying.
<gangee> i would pay for a 44 gigabit back bone <gangee> but hey <gangee> i work at macdonalds what can i say :P <Ufnb> would you like fries with that?
<Pi|Mu|Rho> http://www.bash.org/?36444 <Ozy> geoff gets that lots <Pi|Mu|Rho> I can imagine <Ozy> theres a whole bunch of people stuck to the ceiling nearby my desk, roughly where geoff sits on the floor above us <Pi|Mu|Rho> That's such a hilarious image