<milenko> brand new gaming pc $2500 <milenko> upgrades to play the latest games $500 <milenko> losing your girlfriend $0 <milenko> having a state of the art rig and spending all of your time bumming around on irc with other losers just like you PRICELESS
<daenonok> thats pretty funny...d4n just icqed me that there have been like 48k quotes submitted to bash <daenonok> and less than 10k made it in <daenonok> that means theres 38k ppl who wasted their time submitting crappy quotes <daenonok> thats pretty funny
<tn> !@)#(%&#R <tn> i absolutely DETEST doing tech support for pseudo-management <tn> "hey, i can't log in, it says my password is invalid or something, can you come upstairs and check?" <tn> so i go up and her bloody capslock is on <tn> i mean like, wtf <tn> they need to make Windows DE - Dummies Edition <tn> that will pull up all of the damn error messages BIG and BRIGHT along with the possible causes and bright colours <Peon> hahaha <Peon> poor tn =) <Peon> what's pseudo abt the management? <tn> everything., <Peon> what did u say to her? <tn> "your capslock was on. try again." <Peon> awww. that's too nice =) <tn> i agree <tn> i haven't received my increment yet though. <gampit> bah tn, you're no bofh thats for sure, you shouldve claimed her computer had an unhealthy color so it must contain a virus and then you shouldve smashed it to pieces <tn> that would have wasted too much time. i have better things to do, like access her email now that i've seen the password ;] <Peon> lol. from her typing? <tn> of course <Peon> i'm not that good =( <tn> when ppl type one finger at a time... <Peon> ^^
<snowdrake> no sooner do I upgrade my BIOS for >64GB support than, by all appearances, a kernel driver appears that supports the jumper option I disabled. <snowdrake> but BIOS native support is probably the better option. <MDK> It's a feature. "Annoying Updates" <MDK> In a 4098-bit encrypted folder in an invisible subdirectory. <MDK> I guessed the key by typing with two fingers.
<Shinji> Like a couple playing catch with an aborted fetus, atleast I caught my mistake.
<ChineseElite> dirty is a fsking prono in itself <ChineseElite> ahh shit ive been on net too long.. i just said prono
<pandabob> Dude, you want to catch bin Laden? Open an account in his name at Blockbuster, and don't return a few DVDs. <pandabob> *That'll* catch Bin Laden.
<Kyou|awaying> omfg i almost had a heart attack <Kyou|awaying> I FUCKING HATE STUPID ADS WITH SOUND >_< <HKR|Paper> LOL <HKR|Paper> Especially if it's a pr0n add, and your speakers are cranked and your parents are in the room next door <Kyou|awaying> my speakers are always cranked = <HKR|Paper> They suddenly hear "AH AH AH!" <HKR|Paper> "WTF IS THAT?!" they yell <HKR|Paper> Uh...my brothers rap cd's.
<GSValore> basic VMS system I configured a moment ago from compaq was like $33,000US <GenmaC> haha <GenmaC> "hmmm...get a car...get a VMS box...get a car...get a VMS box..."
Ibekev: yeah that does, I guess you never really know until you meet someone and I'm not trying to put any assumptions into any of this other than I am willing to meet new people and learn more about myself and them at the same time, I don't think you can go out there looking for you soul mate or whatever, it just happens but it won't happen if you're just sitting on your couch Keli_86: right..i completely agree with you Ibekev: So I guess the rule of thumb is to see this as a way to meet new friends and just see Keli_86: you couldnt have put it any better Ibekev: cool, so you wanna get naked and put your webcam back on?
<Abstract> must be nice to have an employer who pays you <lophyte> it is.. <lophyte> your employer don't pay you? <Abstract> nah my clients suck major ass <Abstract> and i hate them <lophyte> lol <Abstract> and the only thing i will ever code for them again is a spoon so they can eat my ass
<@nik0li> SANTA MONICA, Calif. (Wireless Flash) -- A woman in Santa Monica, California, is attempting to lose weight in a manner others may not be able to stomach -- an all-semen diet. <@nik0li> Starting December 1, a plump porn star named Kim Kelly hopes to lose between 10 and 20 pounds by spending 30 days on a diet consisting largely of semen -- or as she prefers, "man juice." <@prence_> shit, ill eat my own man-juice if it will help me lose 30 pounds!
<Rambozo> wow <Rambozo> the lights went out <Rambozo> it's blacker in here than monday nights on UPN
<demonrest> anyone know of a site that would be good to find out if there is a .net activation bypass? <Jaykul> demonrest? <Jaykul> you're not asking for warez HERE, are you? <Daemon> he already got the warez <Daemon> he needs the crack
<dokutake> i never saw the appeal of buttsex anyway <dokutake> i mean, receiving, there's a cock up your ass, and if you're giving, you're getting poo on your wang
<somebodyelse> The original message was received at Wed, 20 Nov 2002 21:07:42 -0600 <somebodyelse> from miaqfl-as-2-ip-6.atlantic.net [209.208.60.37] <somebodyelse> ----- The following addresses had permanent fatal errors ----- <somebodyelse> <email@domain.com> <somebodyelse> (reason: 550 5.7.1 <email@domain.com>... relay attempt failed) <somebodyelse> ----- Transcript of session follows ----- <somebodyelse> ... while talking to mail.seekeywest.com.: <somebodyelse> >>> RCPT To:<email@domain.com> <somebodyelse> <<< 550 5.7.1 <email@domain.com>... relay attempt failed <somebodyelse> 550 5.1.1 <email@domain.com>... User unknown <somebodyelse> why do i get that? <dnky> because, no one would bother to email "email@domain.com"
<@playstation201> check the device manager silly <[TSE]SPaZED> where's that at? <@playstation201> right click on My Computer, click properties, then click hardware, then click device manager ..... <[TSE]SPaZED> im still looking for my computer <@playstation201> ok, then press and hold the windows key, and press the pause break key <@PSX_Cheatster> Oooo... ain't that fancy <@playstation201> impress at my hotkey skillz PSX_Cheatster? :-p <@PSX_Cheatster> Not really playstation201, I don't need to memorize silly hotkeys like that cause I'm smart enough to find My Computer...
IVIasterFunk: biacksfourteen Biax14: iviasterflunk IVIasterFunk: funk* IVIasterFunk: bastard Biax14: D'oh Biax14: My mistake ; IVIasterFunk: my ass Biax14: is smeely IVIasterFunk: the l is nowhere near the l key IVIasterFunk: u* IVIasterFunk: fuck
<spiecq> mike my gf wanna visit canada can we stay at your place <Miscreant> yeah, your gf can stay at my place. <Miscreant> we can find a hotel for you spice
<Wynn> ... I've been single for a long.. long.. long.. time now... <Wynn> and the ladies have been warned. <Gothmog> (as have the men, the livestock and any particularly animate parts of the vegetation)
<Dek> i have jackass downloaded <Killrbyte> Dek: I downloaded JackAss. It was actually Fight Club. Fucking morons. <Dek> i was trying to download porn and got jackass....go figure
166296586: Hello.. How are you? I hope great :-) Lockee: hello, how are you? i hope not another fucking spambot ..... (some time later) ..... Lockee: aww cmon, that all you got? Lockee: a single scripted annoying ass message? Lockee: wait, i know Lockee: damnit i'm stupid..... Lockee: i just advertised this number as being active Lockee: which means now your company can sell it to even LESS scrupulous companies Lockee: fuckmefuckmefuckme
<ReAc> i never alternate between wanking and typing <ReAc> that's just unhygenic <ReAc> unless you're typing with one hand <Hecateh> im typing with the up strokes
(MolsonCanadian) http://www.cnn.com/2002/EDUCATION/11/20/ geography.quiz/index.html (TheOneShamrock) 70 percent cannot find New Jersey, 49 percent cannot find New York, 11 percent cannot find the United States <--- THOSE are the scary ones! (anticimex) ROFL doesn't the US have schools? (anticimex) Only 71% can find the pacific ocean! (Moik) Lord save us if THAT'S the Protector of the Free World. (Moik) "Quick, they need our help guarding freedom in Malaysia!" (Moik) Later in Amsterdam... (Moik) "Malaysians sure smoke alot of hash!"
<DavidGilmour> Some people are like Slinkies... generally useless, but you can't help but smile when you see one tumble down the stairs.
<@keoki> If he is, however, constantly harassing you, then report it to an IRCop. <Rogue> Report it to chanserv <@ChanServ> Report it to me? Bleh, I am just here to aid with channel help, and op you silly mortals. <Rogue> ChanServ doesn't normally talk back to me, he is like the god on IRC, i believe! <@ChanServ> And I said, let there be services! and it was so.
<Pigsbig78> my chat up line is "awk chmod grep"
<Darkroot> Pigsbig78: mine is 'omg, you whore, someone chmod
a+x your-vagina'
<Darkroot> Pigsbig78: omg, you bitch! mv possessions outside;
chown %n car; chmod 600 car; echo 'int main(void) { printf
("x25sn", "haha, you bitch!!n"); }' > meep.c; gcc meep.c -o
meep; ./meep
<wormy98> naw, its one of the new plasma screens <beretta> plasma? isnt that the stuff that the caves in alaska shoot out? <wormy98> no. that's lava, volcanoes, and hawaii. <EDMundane> beretta: is there any limit to your stupidity?
<Shivaway> sue me im bored shitless <mmx> eat a dick? :( <Shivaway> no thx <Shivaway> im on a no dick diet, i hear it goes straight to your ass
<triky> my dad, to this day, says he was in vietnam. and i'm like... dude... that's clinton oklahoma you were in. you joined the airforce so you wouldn't get drafted into the army and die <triky> the old man then learned computer programming <triky> and wrote the very famous program that made kentucky fried chicken cash registers work
(Mobb-Deep) still using AO hell? (tori_anus) no, shabbo.. it's just one of those aol shell accounts so i can be ereet
<suebatwork> How about "want to come to my apt. to smoke a j?" think that will work for a pickup line <grivas> really good if your name is "j"
<The-Virus> any C programmer here :) <wf> yea i got a C in programming class <wf> that count?
<BradJ*hnson> OMG, I lost my mouse! <Dilly4> Your cursor, or your entire mouse? <BradJ*hnson> Um, both. Isn't the cursor attached to the bottom of the mouse? <Dilly4> What? Do you run your mouse around on the screen? <BradJ*hnson> No, on the mouse pad...oh, I see. The cursor is the arrow, right? <Dilly4> New to computers, eh? <BradJ*hnson> You wouldn't believe it, but I'm actually really good with computers Dilly4 doesn't believe it. <BradJ*hnson> How did you do that? I got my mouse back! <Dilly4> it typed "/me doesn't believe it" <BradJ*hnson> "/me wants to make money with computers" Dilly4 suggests that the best way for you to make money is to sell yours. <BradJ*hnson> Fucker. GanGreen thinks he'll submit this lameness to Bash. Dilly4 nods in agreement. <BradJ*hnson> "/me wonders if this is working right on your end. What is Bash?" <Dilly4> GanG, make sure you blank out his name so his family (and future customers) don't see what a lamer he is. <GanGreen> NP. How about if I make it "BradJ*hnson"? Dilly4 laughs his head off. <BradJ*hnson> "/me goes "Just so long as no one recognizes it...I DO sounds kinda stupid. I'm smrat tho" Dilly4 can't control his fits of laughter <BradJ*hnson> smart. you all suck hard.
* [A]LastOutlaw (_A_LastOut@142.161.86.255) has joined #script <[A]LastOutlaw> anyone know what this means "Break: command halted (line 1098, sonica.mrc)" <God> something or someone cancelled the script <[A]LastOutlaw> then how do get rid of it... <God> stop cancelling it <[A]LastOutlaw> k * [A]LastOutlaw (_A_LastOut@142.161.86.255) has left #script
(http://www.yodelbank.com is the worlds first cyberbank u can access using IRC bot commands) *** Now talking in #yodel <r0bb0r> right this is <r0bb0r> a stick up <yodel> hi r0bb0r <r0bb0r> gimme all ur money <r0bb0r> and no one gets hurt * r0bb0r waves gun at all <r0bb0r> come on then i am not joking <yodel> here take it! <yodel> DRAN_100.00_20031119_ShcjkX/ CTzeExE0icgZColDatsQ_F+CldGJPOQO4VKMxSnPdH6SaER w <r0bb0r> thank u <r0bb0r> is this your first robbery? <yodel> yes <r0bb0r> excellent i can claim the first IRC robbery in history * r0bb0r runs off
<Corrupt_> brb i gotta stir the stew <shaan> that so sounds like he is masturbating <shaan> done "stirring the stew" there <Corrupt_> all stirred up <Corrupt_> i got some all over my face
<Killrbyte> HAHAHA. My Dad just told me that once when he was in school he took a blank tape, recorded someone screaming about 30 minutes into it, and put it in a tape player and pressed Play right before the end of class. Then he left it there so during the next class, they suddenly hear a loud scream in the middle of class from this damn tape player.
<Ranzer> Mish``: btw what kinda connection you on? i dont wanna be laggin you too much ;] <Torka> Mish`` is Mish_@andover.net * Mish <Ranzer> and..? <Ranzer> i dont even know what andover.net is <paradon> Ranzer: andover.net is the "big evil corporate" that owns slashdot, sourceforge, newsforge, freshmeat, etc, iirc. <Ranzer> paradon: ah, so it has more bandwidth than god? <tristan_> pretty much :>
(bi0_away) Universal Realm Enterprises, Inc. (PATHFUSION-DOM) (bi0_away) PO Box 903 (bi0_away) Volcano (bi0_away) HI,96785 (bi0_away) US (bi0_away) HI (bi0_away) lol (bi0_away) a city called Hi (bi0_away) "hi, welcome to hi" (FenixTxD) Its hawaii (FenixTxD) idiot.
<D-BOY> how is it people can possibly find japanese people smart <D-BOY> look at their food <D-BOY> they can't figure out how to cook it <D-BOY> look what they do with rice <D-BOY> <Japanese Dude> Maybe if I roll it into a ball it will taste better! <D-BOY> <Chinese or Mexican Guy> I'll lightly pan fry the rice and season it to perfection while adding in choice meats and vegetables to create a dish in itself <D-BOY> <Japanese Guy> I can't figure out how to start a fire. I'll just eat my fish raw. <D-BOY> <Chinese Guy> I'll marinate the fish in a 2:1 ratio of egg to cornstarch and fry it to add a thick breadding. Then coat it in a sauze of ginger, hot bean sazuce, and add vegetables <MM> Maybe it's just age-old tradition...? <D-BOY> More like age-old idiocy <D-BOY> Idiocy is inherited from generation to generation <D-BOY> Look at Israel and Palestine
<ryda> <Skitzo> hold alt and press F+A+X for mirc fax mode <ryda> lol im not that stupid <milenko> nah <milenko> you dont have to hold alt <milenko> just press alt then type fax, its for dccing files, not faxing <ryda> pressing alt f a x quits mirc, you n00b <milenko> no it dosent <milenko> it brings up the dcc window *** ryda has quit IRC <milenko> whos the n00b now?
<lech> porn and programming, what could be better <antiuser> hmm, a real girl? <lech> well that's the source
<zero> apparently the ceo was talking to some manager in the hallway at work today about "change management" <zero> except he kept on saying "management change" <zero> i only wish they got photos of that poor managers face
[coderage] assemblers think c is a pussy language because you use more then half the keyboard
<UPC747> do you need bitches Max? <Max> I have man bitches <Max> er <Max> MANY <Max> man, what a fucking typo <UPC747> ROFL
<debutante> thanks orion you fucking piece of cow shit <orion> oo cow shit <orion> ouchers <orion> i used to step in cow patties as a child <orion> bare foot <orion> and let the shit ooze between my toes <orion> it felt wild <orion> my dad taught me that.