<Feerless> SCHOOL haha <Feerless> i have holidays <Fleebis> DUMBASS haha <Fleebis> i have ops
(@Bird2002): wana know how to get free ms keyboards and mice? (@suicide6x): how? (@Bird2002): do you have a keyboard or mouse now? (@suicide6x): um (@suicide6x): yeah
Finque: at least that young black fellow will live Finque: black people can't die virgins Finque: it's physically and sexually impossible Finque: god is still apologizing for burning them Finque: so he gave them horse cocks Finque: and now they always get laid tom: except DE Finque: true Finque: but DE is canadian Finque: that's god's "oops" pile
<DooMStalK> I was bored, and called 1-800-COW-FUCK once, only to find out COW and BOY take up the same numbers on the phone
<M-ROTDL> Something you NEVER want your mom to say to you: "You've got a large PENIS!" <M-ROTDL> I was sitting down to game of MegaMan Legends 2.... <M-ROTDL> And she strolls by and goes, "Wow... you have a large penis."
<@godofcows> I swear that'd have to be the most evil thing you could do <@Vinic> what about donating 30 billion dollars of countefiet cash to child cancer societies? <@Vinic> on the back of each bill is you jacking off and saying 'here's your medicine bitch'
<@Ramza> When I grow up, I want to be a firetruck. <Vinic> so you could legally hose women down?
<reppy> dudes <reppy> my dad's wife like <reppy> is a child psycholigist <reppy> and one of her patients walked in on her mom getting fucked by the dog <reppy> I got turned on just hearing that:( <Morris> NIce <Morris> You'd think a dog like most mammals would finish really quickly and move on <Morris> But hey, whatever turns her on. <DooMStalK> "Mommy! Mommy! I've got a boo bo... Mommy! What is the dog doing to you? Why do i suddenly have the urge to clean?" <Morris> haha <Morris> "Can I play with the doggy too?" <DooMStalK> "Bad dog! Take that out of mommy!"
<Afkfuckingselfinass> if i run fast enough backwards my exploding ass-flesh could act as a lubricant
<godofcows> I decided on some cool things I'm gonna do when I get rich <godofcows> like ask my mom what car she would like the most, and then buy it <godofcows> and then when she comes outside to look at it, it'll get run over by a monster truck <godofcows> and she'll cry <@godofcows> I thought of another thing I'd do if I ever got rich <@godofcows> I'd gonna buy a bunch of toys for an orphanage <@godofcows> and have them all laid out in front of the building on christmas morning and get someone who works there to wake up all the kids and come out to look <@godofcows> and when they all step outside and look, I'm gonna run over the toys with a monster truck and laugh at the looks on their faces
* byra bounces like a retard <Argent-> Are you listening to something bouncy? <byra> nope. <byra> im listening to the hum of computers <Argent-> Well, that always perks me up. <Argent-> The comforting whirr of fans, the faint ozone smell.. ah, I love that new computer smell you get when you buy a new case. <Argent-> The slick texture of anti-static bags.. <Argent-> the clink of mounting hardware <countzero> -stop- you're turning me on! <countzero> ooh la la.
<s|urpee> like seriously... "Book Appreciation Month"????? <s|urpee> Who the fuck thought that one up? <Argent-> s|urpee - someone who gets hawt talking dewey decimals <s|urpee> 017.223 JER * s|urpee shivers happily <daedalus`> i want to see official geek month... a month where geeks are no percicuted and bullies get hit up for lunch money.... ... that wouls rock <daedalus`> hahaha <Argent-> I want 'throw a fat old guy a mercy fuck' month. * Argent- coughs. <Argent-> Oh, come on- that was funny ,)
<_SnakeMan> do the clocks change tonight? <AlbinoLov> I think they do sunday/ <MiL0> yes <MiL0> unless you live in some parts of indiana or arizona <_SnakeMan> sometime in the early am of sunday, right? <Argent-> The clocks change every night... into fierce blood sucking imps that chase me around the house until I fall over exhausted, then they mock me about my small genitalia.
<Argent-> Call a few adoption agencies asking for a hot 17 year-old girl with a birthday coming up, and they start with the suppoenas.
<Popgun> at least 24 people have died in a fire in a chinese internet cafe <Kuss> popgun, they were probably playing everquest, and didn't want to lose their shit <Argent-> Popgun - how many terminals were pointed to the local fire department website? <Popgun> they clicked onto elexa and self-immolated <Popgun> if that were the case, they would probably welcome the conflagration <Argent-> "De-ah hon-oh-ra-bo fiahman, we buhning up heah, prease send wa-tah, we no wanto stop praying evahquest." <Kuss> oh my god <Kuss> argent <Kuss> that's hysterical <Argent-> More negatives on my karmic burden. <ln> I'd be offended by that if it weren't so funny * ln gives Arg a token asian smack <Popgun> they ghost of Chairman Mao will get you, argento <Popgun> remember the trouble you had with Stalin?
<mstyne> i just wrapped up a 12 hour day at work <mstyne> surprisingly, i feel okay <mstyne> which is probably bad : ) <Etan> only if you tell your bosses, and get longer days <mstyne> well, ordinarily i'd be wiped after 12 hours <mstyne> but i'm not <mstyne> i think they must put something in the water <-- caffine has quit (Remote closed the connection) <mstyne> aha, that answers it <Etan> the guilt overpowered him
[Rascal] : Well, fuck angelicon, he's weird [@Unknown_Source] : Dogs are weird and dumb [@djjason] : Agreed [@Unknown_Source] : I mean, wave the biscuit, and the dumbass dogs comes * Unknown_Source waves a biscuit [Join (#afterhoursdjs)] : [DJAngelicon] [@Unknown_Source] : ...
<TenBaseT> I'm having a nice voddy tonic <Scribble> Mmmmmmmmm <Scribble> VT! <TenBaseT> when you use that absolut citron, you dont need a lime. <Scribble> My favorite. <TenBaseT> yeah. it's sublime. <TenBaseT> badum dum CHING
<FlyNavy> why the fuck does every crisis our country has have to have a catchy title, graphic, and it's own theme song?
<dudeXIII> you guys hear about that sniper in washington? <dudeXIII> camping bitch D:
<^shauny^> i have a prob here <And-1> don't we all ... <^shauny^> no no really <And-1> we're all on here ... that's our prob
<daenonok> yea, but keep in mind when you're talking to d4n you're talking to someone so poor <daenonok> he used to steal five dollars worth of caps (like for cap guns) <daenonok> empty the power into a paper towel, wrap it up and light it <daenonok> and that was his 4th of july
<Chimerasame> my cs-ethics prof is a bigger dork than i am <Chimerasame> he just learned the internet term 'flame' today apparently <Chimerasame> and he kept using it wrong <Chimerasame> "i'm such a flamer today~" <Chimerasame> "what! why's that so funny!"
<daenonok> they should make a programming language for pron in shareware progs <daenonok> so when your work, or family runs an xxx scan prog on your bitch, you come up clean <FURI0U5> ur work or girlfriend ran a pr0n chexxor on yo comp? <daenonok> no, but last night i had a bad dream =[
<skeetuh> sell shit on the web <skeetuh> easy money <halcyon`> like spam newsgroups? <skeetuh> no <skeetuh> I just take stuff out of my family when I have no money and put it on ebay <halcyon`> like kidneys?
<martha> alesha...dont listen to them...sugar has been proven to cure hiccups <martha> a spoonful will do it, wash it down with liquid if you need to <eclipse> so is a quick shake of my protein drink <martha> I have this feeling eclipse's 'protein drink' is something he carries with him at all times, in a convenient little sac
<kow> heh, lil is too anal <kow> I REALLY pissed him off today with that frozen fly <_absent> find a photo of a dead cat on images.google <_absent> post it on your site <_absent> and tell lil you killed that <kow> rofl <kow> I don't need to use google <kow> d:picsdead animals
* GazzaG pee'd in a bottle <GazzaG> too busy watching star wars to goto the toilet
<Max-> worse than shite 200mhz pentium with 32mb ram and monitors @ 60hz? <CUI> Max- That's not computer <CUI> That's a calculator
[JJJTTT] what's this 707 thiong? [st-707-afk] oh [st-707-afk] that's LOL upside-down [JJJTTT] gotcha [st-707-afk] HTTP 707: File Not Funny [st-707-afk] that's gonna be one of my new error messages [st-707-afk] well, neither of us are gainfully employed so that's what happens [st-707-afk] sit here and think of stupid shit
[st-packing-car] going and doing errands [st-packing-car] collecting what I need [MrFootsy`] oh [st-packing-car] dump, bank and letting the kids put bottles and cans in the redemption machine [MrFootsy`] never seen one of those [st-packing-car] well you just haven't lived [MrFootsy`] a redemption machine...those catholics sure have embraced technology [st-packing-car] lol
<TreFitty> bloodClot`, I remember when you made fun of my viewsonic monitor <TreFitty> :( <bloodClot`> you remember a lot of weird shit that never happened
<JerryBeep> There are two kinds of jokes in the world: Jokes that people respond to by saying "lol" and funny jokes. <melipompous> lol <JerryBeep> You bastard.
<brent> I think when you check all the empty beer cans you have a problem on your hands <sledge> and that would be no more beer
Cr|t|cal kicked by cajuncook (those "|"s are really obnoxious) 6:10pm (|N-64|) those "|"'s are called pipes. (cajuncook) well (cajuncook) they are quite obnoxious (gogglespy) so would #| be a hash pipe?
<Daedalus> i think i am sexy <Daedalus> in a gay way <riz> *crickets* <Phusion> wow.
<trunck> how long doesschool have a vacation? <Nec> till monday, i think <<Nec> next week, that is. <trunck> whoa <trunck> really long <trunck> fucking school kids <Nec> is illegal.
<{GkC}-LiQ[na]> have... to... get... out of... chair
<{GkC}-LiQ[na]> argh
<{GkC}-LiQ[na]> i have to go to the toilet but i've to go all
the way down then
<{GkC}-LiQ[na]> downstairs
<{GkC}-LiQ[na]> i'm at the attick
* YoungBlood throws a pie down the stairs
* {GkC}-LiQ[na] runs after it
<Azzid> owned!! :D
<MiLordDemise> My foot is touching the cord for my keyboard <MiLordDemise> and each time I press a button I can feel the electrical pulse go through the wires <IntoMyShadows> Now that's something. <MiLordDemise> Aye... <MiLordDemise> I wish I could type a bit faster <MiLordDemise> it makes my foot feel good and strange at the same time <IntoMyShadows> Just hit random keys <MiLordDemise> it's like a cord-thin massage <MiLordDemise> wow <MiLordDemise> I think I need some alone time with my keyboard now <MiLordDemise> hehe <IntoMyShadows> Maybe you should move the cord to another part of you <MiLordDemise> I just might <IntoMyShadows> you sick bastard. <IntoMyShadows> I probably would, too <MiLordDemise> You suggested it <MiLordDemise> so that makes us both sick bastards <MiLordDemise> go us!
<Powie> When sucking my dad I know which women in the family are pregnant, and which are in their period
<SteveTheNormalGuy> link plzzzzzzzzz <SteveTheNormalGuy> wait, another z should do it <MegamanX2K> x <MegamanX2K> err <MegamanX2K> damnit * MegamanX2K cannot spell "z"
<mordac> Beige: I bought a WATCH from some guy in Battery Park! <mordac> I totally haggled. <mordac> I told him I only had $10 for it, and he was like OKAY :( except I only had twenty dollar bills. <mordac> He even gave me the change.
«TiGryphon» ...but there's nothing quite as priceless as the look on a teenage cashier's face as she rings up wine, cheese, bread, and chats aimiably with you, and then rings up a cucumber, and a box of condoms and gets suddenly quiet...
<Supe> <Beelzebub> www.xxxxxxxxx.com/gulfgirls2004 SeX SeX SeX !! <Supe> beelze are you trying to harbour viruses? <Beelzebub> nothing wrong with viruses <Beelzebub> they are part of the natural selection process on the internet
<tech-mage> could someone possibly help me. i am studying linux but dont have a *nix box. can someone make me a root shell account that i can practice with?
<VanWilder> god i used this massage oil on this chick last night and now my room wreaks of it <nivenh> were you massaging "her" penis?
<KodiaK> fuck the oil companies <KodiaK> 73.9 cents for gas <KodiaK> why dont they just add a retractable dildo to each gas pump <KodiaK> so while you fill your tank up, it can fuck you in the ass while you do it
<Deviant> Never argue with an idiot. They drag you down to their level, then beat you with experience.