hQDB :: hacker Quote Database

Network Stats: 21142 Approved Quotes | 1 in Moderation Queue
#4003 [ + | - ] 212
<Nazke|du> Your ass is russian, in other words its cold and
only inviting to women with beards.
#3999 [ + | - ] 347
<Veers> Welcome to insomnia, Tony. Even Masturbation won't
work right.
#3998 [ + | - ] 697
<Donitz> Do you like waffles?! Do you like Nazi propaganda?!
Then do we have the restaraunt for you!
#3995 [ + | - ] 486
<Donitz> Sleep! From Blamco! Its kinda like dying - but
without the commitment!
#3993 [ + | - ] 184
* DAEMON watches the most expensive videos on mtv
<SkiTz> the most expensive is bound to be a Michael Jackson
clip.
<DAEMON> it costs a lot to buy small children on the black
market for his dressing room
#3992 [ + | - ] 241
<Matt> so much hostility
<Spike> for such a tiny little hole
#3991 [ + | - ] 402
<DAEMON> marked by circumcision
<DAEMON> hm, that sounds like a Steven Segal movie
#3990 [ + | - ] 100
<Lowtax> Command and Conquer? Is that being the movie with
Regis & kathy Lee?
#3985 [ + | - ] 299
<scummo> I was saying "eat a dick" even then, trying to get
good grades by drawing pictures of shoes
<scummo> a tradition I keep up even today
<scummo> the 4.0 on the 15-page paper about the importance of
midgets and dwarfs in film has to be my crown jewel
#3984 [ + | - ] 335
[11:29] *** kiwix is now known as kiwiGF
[11:34] *** kiwiGF is now known as kiwix
<mightyflo> that was quick.
#3979 [ + | - ] 209
(AngelGrl) unix sounds like lego.. am i right?
#3976 [ + | - ] 222
<therioman> at this rate i'll end up working for some company,
being married and having 4 kids
<therioman> which i will ensure doesn't happen
<therioman> i shall barricade myself with 45U racks
#3975 [ + | - ] 558
<ScumDog> my first BBS name ever, when I was something like 11
years old, was pothead.
<ScumDog> except that I was named after a local band, and had
no idea what an actual "pothead" was
<ScumDog> so people were always like "Rahhh! 420 4-ever!!!"
and I had no clue what they were talking about
#3974 [ + | - ] 27
[OutLore  ] horray! my crossover cable worked! putting ends on
is easy....
[madwoota ] if you have a crimper :P
[OutLore  ] took me 45 for the first one, 5 for the second..
:)
[madwoota ] cat5 ends take < 10 seconds
[OpsuPup  ] but you're l33t woota
[OpsuPup  ] how could OutLore possibly hope to compete with
you?
[madwoota ] i know, it's tough, but someone has to be this
good
#3973 [ + | - ] 290
<Ouroboros> suds: You are drunk, we are sober. Why are you
sad?
<suds> i dunno
<suds> maybe cuz all the chicas at the club were so underage
it was like walkin into jail
*** suds has some standards
<suds> noone under 18
<suds> now that i'm 22
<Ouroboros> I only have 2 standards.
<Ouroboros> A left one and a right one.
#3972 [ + | - ] 117
*** Now talking in #sandstorm
­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­***
Topic is 'http://media.sub-sonix.net:8008 all sandstorm, all
the time... for 60 days until the RIAA starts charging'
#3970 [ + | - ] 98
<Hostile> Would you eat mung if it tasted like chicken?
<Hostile> Would you eat chicken if it tasted like mung.
<Scofco> ...
<Scofco> what's mung?
<Hostile> It's the stuff inside of a pregnant chick i think.
<Scofco> there's lots of stuff inside pregnant chicks
<Hostile> Yeah, that's mung.
#3969 [ + | - ] 129
<blazemore> these japanese guys walked up to me and my friend
and started talking to us
<blazemore> and asking which bands we like
<blazemore> so we started naming some off but they hadn't
heard of any of them
<blazemore> then i'm like "uh... guns 'n roses"
<blazemore> and they're all "oh yes, we like them very much!"
<ScumDog> you should've whistled "patience" to them
<ScumDog> as a universal message of love
<ScumDog> it transcends the spoken word
#3947 [ + | - ] 288
<Digital-^> i love brits , every time i hear someone mention a
fag break all i can think of is someone knocking on my door ,
picking me up , and smoking me
#3946 [ + | - ] 697
<@EvilSxxd> it's a sad sad day when a man lets a woman move
into his balls
<@Vashie> my nutsack is as safe as fort nox
<@EvilSxxd> checked and handled by 1000s of sweaty soldiers a
day?
#3944 [ + | - ] 349
(seiki) &google inflatable+goat
(fnet) Google (inflatable+goat): http://
www.vacationbibleschool.com/v_newfeatures.html
#3939 [ + | - ] 363
<@Chaz> How the hell it went through a folded-over (two
layers) sock is beyond me...
<Nyphur> ... o_0
#3938 [ + | - ] 572
<sTek> "ONLY FRIENDS", i hate those two words
<sTek> even worse than "im pregnant"
#3937 [ + | - ] 772
<Nall> type /nick newname to fix your name
*** amit is now known as newname
#3936 [ + | - ] 7245
<+kritical> christin: you need to learn how to figure out
stuff yourself..
<+Christin1> how do i do that
#3935 [ + | - ] 2100
*** Signoff: Morpheus (Connection reset by peer)
*** Morpheus (vanford@host-209-214-188-107.clt.bellsouth.net)
has joined channel #relax
<Morpheus> argh.. that wasn't my speaker cable
#3934 [ + | - ] 442
<maff> I've got a riot breaking out in my pants
<D1> need some backup?
<D1> I mean...
<D1> ok, that was really gay.
<maff> I don't get down like that d1
<D1> I apologize.
<Guilty> Why dont you just join the cast of Oz and get it over
with D1
#3932 [ + | - ] 1145
<Detrafilia> One time i was so tired, i had asked 'how are
you?' in rpgamer, and then i looked in a diff query, went back
to rpgamer, saw the 'how are you?' and i go 'oh fine, just a
little sleepy. thanks. You?'
#3931 [ + | - ] 185
<Panty_HaX0r> I masturbate near constantly, and I have a
steady supply of sex
<Scofco> sex-drives that high should be bottled and sold on
store shelves
#3928 [ + | - ] 344
<illfates> the first time I had an orgasm
<illfates> i had my dick buried all the way into a stuffed
animal
<illfates> a kangaroo named "Fred"
#3927 [ + | - ] 391
<cornbeef> 8? i didnt even know what a vagina was at 8
<Scofco> I didn't learn to masturbate until I was 17... up
until then I always thought 'masturbation' was a type of pasta
dish they served in fancy restaurants
#3926 [ + | - ] 513
<Panty_HaX0r> how old are you?
<phubuh> 13
<Scofco> I wish I was 13 again, then I wouldn't have AIDS
#3925 [ + | - ] 59
<gg0dd> ok what do i declare the variable the user inputs an
IP adress??
<gg0dd> u know lets say i want him to type 127.0.0.1
<O_6> what language are you speaking?
<gg0dd> c++
<matts> hahaha
#3920 [ + | - ] 749
<djLiKu> tell her to give me a blueprint of her vagina
<blazemore> wtf are you gonna do with a blueprint
<blazemore> construct your own vagina?
<djLiKu> yes
<djLiKu> it's like ocean's 11
<djLiKu> i'm gonna plan out first with a demo
#3918 [ + | - ] 463
<zetullus> This is just not happening. Im sure I was smarter
than this when I went to bed
#3917 [ + | - ] 121
* FlipTopBx crosses his fingers
<FlipTopBx> pleeeease snow.  ;-)
<mightyflo> people have stuff to do tomorrow. stuff they've
been looking forward to for a long time. snow would be bad.
<FlipTopBx> oh, that party is tomorrow, isn't it.
<FlipTopBx> where's he live?
<mightyflo> the land of kirk
<FlipTopBx> i'll make arrangements for it not to snow in that
area then
#3913 [ + | - ] 269
<ScumDog> Mexicans rock because down in Mexico they're too
poor to update any of the arcade games
<ScumDog> so all the players rock at games on 12-year-old
hardware
<ScumDog> not surprisingly, there's also a large concentration
of Double Dragon champions there
#3912 [ + | - ] 331
<i4get> life sucks.
<Waldo> yeah, but so do some girls so it kinda evens out
<i4get> X(
<i4get> funny Waldo
#3909 [ + | - ] 725
<BombScare> i should go buy a skateboard and go sk00l some
kids at the park
<BombScare> since im an expert at all 3 tony hawk games, i
should have no problem pulling off those tricks in real life
#3908 [ + | - ] 875
*** Jei-Dijitaru has quit IRC (Do we really need warnings that
the lead in paint will kill you? Keep in mind that these
people have already made a conscious decision to CONSUME
PAINT.)
#3905 [ + | - ] 238
<Rbrt> i have decided to file for a divorce
<nharris> Rbrt.. wise move
<Rbrt> yepp neil
<closedown> did you just have a kid?
<Rbrt> yes i did
<nharris> my brother's inlaws are DICKS.. except his bro in
law..he's cool
<Rbrt> the kid doesnt change the fact that she's a psycho
<closedown> ah
<closedown> my gf's trying to hint at marriage
<closedown> that would surely cut into my irc time
#3902 [ + | - ] 896
<+Tre> how do I get girls to have sex with me?
<+sp00n> show them software you have written..woman go wild
for that kind of stuff
<+Tre> for real? how should i show them? do I carry my laptop
around and show random woman??
#3898 [ + | - ] 967
*** opinion (ED@blahblahblah.bla) has joined #bemani
<opinion> hey guys
<opinion> WHY DONT YOU VOICE YOUR OPINION
*** ScumDog sets mode: +v opinion
#3894 [ + | - ] 174
<gc> it would take approximatly 40 286's to equals the power
of your average 1 GHz desktop
<cabbage> um, where did you pull that crap from?
<gc> do the math
<cabbage> haha
<ian> what math
<_gene> well you know .. THE math ;)
<jwzrd-> gc: are you adding clockspeed here ?
<gc> no its the cache,
#3893 [ + | - ] 646
<elliptic> does any1 else name their member set/get functions
with "Please" in the end?
#3891 [ + | - ] 836
(|Chris) it's the gift that keeps on giving
(Amanda`) Herpes?
#3888 [ + | - ] 287
<nitrifik_> wtf? that's blazemore? he looks 12!
<P2E> maybe that's why he has so much porn
#3887 [ + | - ] 219
<KNG_SNK> ok i was at work today
<KNG_SNK> and two ppl were missing...
<KNG_SNK> and this guy's office was locked
<KNG_SNK> but i knew there was someone in there... VERY quiet
too
<KNG_SNK> so me and some buds went over to the next building
<KNG_SNK> to try to peek in
<KNG_SNK> and man... they were goin at it
<KNG_SNK> but we could clearly see humping action
#3885 [ + | - ] 242
<ScumDog> I don't think the act itself is sick, though.
They're going to have sex with someone, it might as well be
me.
#3883 [ + | - ] 22
<baras> who can help me to find job in holland, maybe in farm?
pls