<jettekuk> can anybody help me? <ironi> jettekuk: i hope you realize your nick mean huge cock in swedish (and maybe other languages as well) <jettekuk> no i didn t know that <jettekuk> my name is jettek and i live in the uk
Sarah: I hate how society says we all have to be thin Jenn: I'm fat because I'm rebelling
<phazonfox> Mario Kart is socialist. <phazonfox> People in last place get better items.
<FireHmpstr> My friend broke up with his girlfriend or whatever <FireHmpstr> So now every damn time I see the fucker I have to hear him whine <FireHmpstr> "But I loved her so much, how could i ever live without her, Blah blah..." <FireHmpstr> And all I can think about is how to kill him without anybody finding out. <FireHmpstr> and then maybe rape that bitch too <XKKBK> err, are you talking about me? <FireHmpstr> OH SHI- <FireHmpstr> forgot you were here
<TreCool> I had the stupidest secretary ever today at the unviersity. I walked in to get my transcripts and she tells me she needs my school ID number and my first and last name. Now I'm wearing my hat that has my last name on the back of it over the Oilers symbol and I'm wearing the hat backwards so its right out there for her to see. So anyway, I give her my id number and my first name then say my last name. The secretary said "Oh cool! Just like the one on your hat! Now how do you spell that?" I was like "...". I was so tempted to bitch slap that moron.
<nickee> how can i se the size on layers in photoshop ?? <Unhold> ctrl+acn return ctrl+v alt+ii <Unhold> common shortcut <nickee> huh o_O <Unhold> yeah, sometimes i think photoshop evolved from emacs
<_grunt> wife washed my damned wallet <_grunt> i got freshly laundred money <_grunt> my driving record is now clean <_grunt> a new social security card washed up <_grunt> wonder if the soap washed the debit off my credit cards
<GoreJanez> I hate that captain of Enterprise from star trek <GoreJanez> He's like an irc-newby <GoreJanez> when he meets someone in space, he's all like: "hi, how are you, where are you from, wanna be my friend?" <R_Nereda> #gothicmetal solar system would be his final frontier <GoreJanez> he'd got attacked by ban-beams in no time
<blast007> okay, here's what you do <blast007> you go to a resturant, and you ask for a grilled cheese sandwich <blast007> and ask for limburger cheese on it <A-Delusion> I always ask for a chicken and an egg, to see which comes first.
<@Kaczynski> I say reinstate the death penalty <@Kaczynski> and execute corrupt politicians <@Kaczynski> how are they acting differently from organized criminals? <@andro> they're getting caught
<killsdow> do harddrives like... <killsdow> lose speed if u rewrite on them too much?
<okin^2> hi <okin^2> how can I retrieve my password? <@shasta> refresh your memory <@shasta> :)
<Gayo> I miss being able to type. <Gayo> It was nice. <Amy> ... <Amy> What are you doing now then, using telepathy? <Gayo> I'm dictating to my secretary <Gayo> semicolon close parantheses
<iFx|shade> this guy aidan was aruging with this chick emma at tea <iFx|shade> and shes like saying it wouldnt hurt that much getting kicked in the balls <iFx|shade> and he goes spread your legs then and ill kick you in the balls <iFx|shade> and shes like i dont have balls <iFx|shade> and he goes who are you trying to kid with a mostache like that <iFx|shade> and she got up and left
<Eric> I feel bad when handshaking with PuTTY. It supports so many features. "I can tell you what sort of client I am, would you like to know?" "Nope." "Well, in that case, let me just tell you my screen dimensions." "No thanks." "Do you... uh... want to support environment variables? I got some variables." "... no." "Well, I guess it's echo off and raw mode, then."
<Mikey> So theres this chick at work thats pretty cute <Mikey> And she saw me outside having a smoke one time on a break <Mikey> And she goes "You should give that up" <Mikey> That means she cares about my wellbeing and would possibly sleep with me right? <stevenst> No, it just means she's an opinionated bitch <Mikey> :(
eI pianisto: So.. eI pianisto: I called to complain about the slow DSL speeds. eI pianisto: and they told me eI pianisto: that it was because all the kids are out of school and "in their stupid chat rooms"
<S_Sprite> oh god <S_Sprite> all I can hear <S_Sprite> right now <S_Sprite> is the squeeking of my housemates mattress <S_Sprite> I'M TRANSLATING ANCIENT GREEK YOU INSENSITIVE FUCKS <S_Sprite> well they'll be sorry when my hard studying has got me a PhD in classical studies and all they'll have is MDs from some top-rated med school <S_Sprite> fuck
<Nick> how come everytime I see the phrase "Future-Proof" I read it as "yesterday's obsolescent" <Lanei> because you posess sufficient quantities of the cynicism necessary for survival <Force10> Man, if cynicism is all you need to survive, I'm gonna live to be 150.
MightyMooquack> Huh. This is something I've not seen in C code before... Iconoplast> comments? Iconoplast> HA HA HA BURN
<HardlyJW> anyone know how to change an ip? <lysip> yes <lysip> clone your mac <HardlyJW> ? <HardlyJW> i have windows...
Hekili_Manu: Ok. So I called my bank's fraud dept about that hotels.com letter I got since I apparently used them twice with two different cards. I forgot completely that when I signed up you can assign your own security question online. Hekili_Manu: So when I called and spoke to the guy they use the same security question and he asked me "Ok, I just need to verify one thing. How big is your c**k?"
<ido> anywho, i'll go write my own <ido> it should only take a few hundred lines of coke <ido> i mean code...
(+Cafe`) I am into AZN GANGSTAS (tehjeebus|x) gangstas that can do math... that means they're the worst people to buy crack from
nocashvaluedrumz: they need to reinvent the internet nocashvaluedrumz: so i can enjoy it with both hands
<Razhal> The internet is a beautiful place.... <Razhal> Because no matter what kind of twisted freak you are, you've got a friend out there :D <Razhal> You could ask the internet "Find people who have sex with goats on fire." <Razhal> And internet will ask you, "What kind of goats?"
ClonaZjeveni5: It isn't a biased opinion ClonaZjeveni5: its true xenotwuz: I'm thinking your opinion on biased opinions is biased.
<HarbPBN> I got home at like 4am. <TruckPBN> Get layed? <ebolaaaa> Isn't it "laid"? <TruckPBN> ebolaaaa: I'm married... I dont remember.
<@pinata> i am going to be patenting my new method of internet access. <@pinata> it will be 6 times as fast... <@pinata> but drop 90% of all of your connections. <@pinata> i will call it ADHDSL
<codyryan> because men, have problem controlling their testosterone <Skiz> not me I'm a pretty good shot.
<AwwJeah> I want to fill a super soaker with cheap vodka and spray down other drivers. <AwwJeah> Then call the police and tell them I think they're driving drunk. <AwwJeah> Because, seriously, who would believe that story?
<Shadow> A super computer running on Windows XP? Thats like a tight rope walker walking on barbed wire...
Sleepaholic88: >>> Sleepaholic88: Err. I tried to capitalize a period so it would be bigger.
<Nacho> So, you have several types of tourist: You have the "I'm on vacation, so I'm just gonna relax" types, that just wear comfy clothes. <Nacho> You then have the "I'm in some place special, so I'm going to dress nice" types. <Nacho> And then you have the "What happens in $location stays in $location, so I'm going to dress like an exhibitionist slut" types. I like those... ;-)
<Rolan> I think black people on TV is illegal in Texas <CatSkills> and it will remain so until they televise executions
<kosh> we have a bug that occurs on the 31st of a month <kosh> so once a month we get a bug report <kosh> it gets assigned to a developer within 24 hours <kosh> who then fiddles for a bit before marking it "unable to reproduce"
<Orphic> you any good at physics? <meowcow> when i run into a wall i usually stop
<Beowulf> ever since I switched to wireless I get disconnected whenever I get a phone call <Beowulf> :( <squirrel_remote> What's your phone number? <Beowulf> fuck you
<Eddo36> sometimes I feel like shit, you know, what sick shit I get off to. but I can't change <Littlelisa> You know eddo, if you never said anything, people may like you <Eddo36> if i never said anything, who would know me? <Littlelisa> thats the point
sw0813: you know, the movie ray really was inspiring sw0813: he was blind, and yet still managed to hit his wife sw0813: that means either of two things: sw0813: 1. his wife was stupid or sw0813: 2. he wasnt really blind sw0813: i mean seriously, was it like "marco," "polo" WHAM!
<Heiler> I feel stupid asking this, but how many pints are in a cup? <Swinky> it depends on how big the cup is <Heiler> Thanks, suddenly I don't feel so stupid.
<Greenbox> the place i ordered chicken parmesan from forgot the chicken <Greenbox> so instead of calling and complaining, like a normal person would <Greenbox> I used asterisk and called them from the number of the department of health <Greenbox> and told them a random screening of their food had just been conducted, and they failed miserably <Greenbox> so they were ordered not to serve food until an inspection later today
<Sid> I'm running a joke so far into the ground it'll become the next major oil supply.
Begging to Limp: heh Begging to Limp: so, apparently al gore's last speech on global warming flopped badly Begging to Limp: he gave a speech last winter in new york city on global warming Begging to Limp: the result? -1 degree fahrenheit average temperature for the day, the coldest day in new york's history Begging to Limp: when mother nature disagrees, she proves it
<sh4ve> hehe, i wrote a assembly proggy to convert normal numbers to roman ^^ <GodOfGoats> You are so MCCCXXXVII
Charmaine----: I'm a 26 year old single mom ;-) Kolobos Psychi: Holy crap! a black women IMed me! @_@ Charmaine----: How did you know I was black?
<blazemore> my brother is in a quake3 clan <blazemore> and he had a ctf game tonight <blazemore> we were walking out of tilt <blazemore> his friend goes "dude hurry up, you're gonna be late for you clan meeting" <blazemore> and these black guys were walking by <blazemore> and looked like they were about to kick our asses