<Rev> my house of 1000 corpses download is done <ix> what a waste of bandwidth <@Volsus> unless that's a sims expansion pack
prettykittikat: Im going 2 the club 2night Syric 2005: im going 2 lern 2 tipe 2nite 2 prettykittikat: what? Syric 2005: Exactly
<themole> I was thinking of quiting my job at target <soapy> you should look into getting a job at goatse <soapy> I heard they have a large opening
<boon> today started out so aweful <boon> I got up early, poured a bowl of cereal, OJ...I was set. Had 45min until I had to leave for work. I thought I'd go downstairs and grab the laundry from the dryer before I started eating <boon> I get to the bottom of the stairs and *slam*...the door to my place closes behind me <boon> SCREWED <Kammo> oh, no! You had to open the door?!
Steve: I was buying condoms for a friend of mine at the beach in a drug store Steve: and I also picked up one of those freezable ice packs cuz I hurt my knee surfing that day Steve: I put both of the items on teh counter Steve: the big black guy behind the counter looks at me and says quite loudly Steve: son, what are you gonna do to that poor girl Steve: this older couple that was checking out looks at me and then hurries out fo the store
thejew: omg i just found a memory leak that has existed since the dawn of time PlasmaHH: hm, this would explain why the universe is so big...
<Diamant>I just compleated intercourse with your female parental unit, as they say in the hood.
SuperGiddyup222: I just watched an episode of married with children and ate a TV dinner work it joe: youre living the american dream work it joe: one heartbreaking piece at a time
<earmuff-man> Yeah the last plane out of Sydney's almost gone <earmuff-man> And it's really got me worried <earmuff-man> I'm goin' nowhere and I'm in a hurry <earmuff-man> And the last plane out of Sydney's almost gone <spinifex> earmuff man can i be an op? <spinifex> just for tonight? <earmuff-man> ok <spinifex> * earmuff-man sets mode: +o spinifex * ChanServ sets mode: +l 12 <earmuff-man> Well the last plane out of Sydney's almost gone * earmuff-man was kicked by spinifex (quit your singing bitch) <spinifex> bahahahhhaa
<Victorian_Skunk> Is there a new virus going around? My Windows has suddenly changed to another language! I think it's Croatian. <Dan> You Got Serbed!
<pab> dude, how do you know what condom size to get <pab> I dont want it to be ockward... but I have no idea <pab> is there a way to view webcam over irc? <omnica> .... <omnica> bring the measurements to the pharmicist <pab> it's 2am... <omnica> bring measurements to the 7-11 attendant
<EvilBlood> i had a crazy dream last night <EvilBlood> my mother barged into my room and started hitting my computer <EvilBlood> i threw her down, and ended up sniffing her pussy through her panties <EvilBlood> weird «@ tanlin999» so what was the dream? <EvilBlood> oh yeah that <EvilBlood> well
<timmo> it blows my mind <timmo> that some people want to just be born, grow up, etc just in one place <timmo> and not go out and explore the world <v3dd3r> shutup magellan
Mike: I had a random thought in the shower just before Mike: I think I was still half asleep Mike: if you smacked a kid in the face with a bottle of johnson's no more tears, would it create beautiful irony? Hopper: ROFL
<Velk> I have my school pay phones on my cell contact list <Velk> my friend and I plan to go to New York city and take down as many pay phone numbers as we can <Velk> and single out a person, and every payphone he passes we'll call <Velk> just to creep him out
Threatis I'm trying to figure out what "geek" tattoo I'm getting. khmer Threatis: get <blink> tattooed on your eyelids
<AmW> I got rearended by a car with "CARMA" vanity plates today. <AmW> destiny can't spell.
<rhc> apparently it's rude if <rhc> somebody asks if you have a light <rhc> and you reply: "yes, but it's at the end of the tunnel"
(SirJohnny) How do you feel about the US in the middle east? (Talya) Uhhh (Talya) They give us money (Talya) so w00t (SirJohnny) What if Bush woke up one day, and was like "WE'RE GOING TO INVADE ISRAEL BECAUSE...UHM...LIKE, I THINK THEY HAVE NUCLEAR WEAPONS!" what would you do? XD (Talya) (we do have nuclear weapons)
Blade Madrigal: Why don't Libraries carry books on suicide? Ice Sickle: They'd never get returned? Blade Madrigal: there you go. Ice Sickle wins. BanishTheShadowKing: .. Dang. That's the first time I ever saw anyone answer a joke. That's awesome. HailFire: Neko, you have l337 skills.
M8525888: here, you gotta press a and e really fast M8525888: æ Ryoji 17: ae Ryoji 17: ae Ryoji 17: ae Ryoji 17: ae ... Ryoji 17: ae Ryoji 17: ae M8525888: æ i o u Ryoji 17: ae Ryoji 17: ae
<Dogan> but I knew this one mathematician guy in college <Dogan> he tried to apply for a grant to get funding for his project <Dogan> and on the form he said his project involved "studying the effects of tropical vacations on mathematicians"
<Shiv> really, how can you make a "combatting illiteracy" poster anyway? <Shiv> make it a map to the library?
<hammergunner> i want to see a big red button one day that read "push here to understand women" <cccnnn> hammer: yeah that's the withdraw cash button on the ATM machine.
[GmJ] some idiot made a iso of 2 more isos [GmJ] so when I burned it [GmJ] there are 2 isos on the cd
<Papa_Trousers> you ever think the guys who invented the word sex spelled it that way so we could type it with our left hands?
<%Justin> lol <%Justin> I've always wanted to ask a girl for a cron job and see what they would say. <+Steph> probably, WTF <%Justin> hmm <%Justin> Steph, will you give me a cronjob. <%Justin> Everynight @ 2
MasterKayin: Dude, those Kamakazi pilots in WW2 were crazy... MasterKayin: If they threw me in a plane and told me to go crash into something MasterKayin: I'd just take off and go somewhere else MasterKayin: Like on vacation or something along those lines MasterKayin: I'd go to Hawaii MasterKayin: Er... wait...
<atrus> i worked on a project once where somebody named variables defined in various places explicity so on one line of code, it showed up as: <atrus> function_name($all, $urBase, $rBelong, $toUs); <atrus> closest i've ever come to manslaughter
[Buck_Satan] take the amount of pussy you've gotten, times that by three and that should be a rough estimate of how much I've gotten [Buck_Satan] fag [Baron von Mannsechs] 0 x 3 = 0, Buck
<tally> why does it seem like out of the ton of people listed on the right, only four are talking <vette> the rest are whispering
diggertrocknroll: Graham, my girlfriend just listed bukkake as one of the top five ways to kill a man diggertrocknroll: I blame you Grahamenstein: why me? Grahamenstein: there were four other guys
<JDProject> can someone explain the difference between a hub and a router ? <ffejtable> one works at layer 2, the other at layer 3+ <LeddyWK> if he's asking the difference, chances are he doesn't know the osi model
(placid|work) i knew a girl that was fat just because of her asthma medication (@Rayn) what was she taking for asthma ... cheeseburgers?
<root66> so, I was contracted to write a text messaging client for windows. I said I wanted $250 upfront and $250 upon completion. He only sent $200 <root66> so I completed it but made it crippled and put "demo" in the titlebar <root66> and he told me "this is just some demo you downloaded. I am not giving you any more money" <root66> so I changed "demo" to "cheapskate version - that means you dave" and sent it again <root66> now he won't answer my emails
<opensoar> you know how my wife looks really young right? <jb> yeah - she looks about 15 <opensoar> we'd been playing tennis and she was in little shorts and a t-shirt <opensoar> we went to a mall and i figured i'd embarrass her with a bit sloppy kiss.. <jb> lol - you bastard! <opensoar> after i'd slobbered all over her, she pushed me away and shouted out "Ew! Dad! GROSS!" <opensoar> the whole place thought i was some kind of pervy..
<ag> Diablo-D3: Have you considered Front Page? It's much easier, and you still get to look dumb.
<Vipsta> I once keylogged this guy coding C <Vipsta> biggest fucking mess ever :\
themadchef: they dont hire that often themadchef: i went there awhile ago iLOVEthat AliceD: and? themadchef: they werent hiring themadchef: lol iLOVEthat AliceD: thats a fucked up story man iLOVEthat AliceD: i liked the twist ending
<Mifuyne> how old is your iBook anyway? <+indigo> 4 years. <+indigo> :-P <Mifuyne> ah <~Delta> jeez <~Delta> that thing was made before the war
<Maduin> Is it weird if you recognize a girl in your inbox porn from your highschool? <TheUpstairsProTHAway> I think the most comedic answer would be, "It depends what part you recognized."
Salsa Shark: you know what google earth needs? ULJarad: More 3D buildings? Salsa Shark: ion cannon button
<Tre_Cool>: Man I'm soooo hungry... I could eat more hot dogs than that lil japenese guy. <Netters>: I got 20 bucks that says you can't do that. <Tre_Cool>: Listen, I'm not intimidated by you OR your freakish talking money.
<keepingcharlie> i had lots of sex when i was under 18., man i miss those days. i wish i would have realized what i had, when i had it. <rabbiwanna> You probably still have it. <rabbiwanna> Get tested.
<ravedreamcast> well at least i had some fun in the back seat <ravedreamcast> the true gift of partys <Cryomancer> you brought your gameboy?
<konefku> If you have twins, im buying you a shirt that points to your left side that says "I LOVE THIS ONE MORE."
SMB61890: have u heard bout that earthquake stuff under the sea Fairies Exist90: no is ariel ok? SMB61890: i dont kno how to spell the name of it Fairies Exist90: and king triton? SMB61890: what? Fairies Exist90: and sebastian? Fairies Exist90: and flounder? Fairies Exist90: ARE THEY OK?!