<Syberia> FUCK i'm dead <Syberia> i was flirting with this 15 y/o chick i met on halo <Syberia> she went to use the little girls' room <Syberia> her 11 y/o sis walked in and saw what she was doing <Syberia> got her mom, who read the whole MSN convo <Syberia> she starts talking to me, telling me her daughter's only 12 <Syberia> you'd think she'd get pissed at her daughter but no, now someone's mom who i don't even know in ohio now knows my phone # and thinks i'm a pedophile <SirChris> dude, chicks don't play halo
* nickname has joined #mp3friendschat <nickname> word <+bobbbit10> excel? <+Davman> rofl
omg omg wtf n00b: y'know what's hilarious? omg omg wtf n00b: when people boast about what they do on the internet omg omg wtf n00b: "omg im so drunk right now i had like 20 captain morgans" omg omg wtf n00b: and "omg im gonna get laid tonight its gonna be amazing" Americandude23: yeah. thats why i dont use irc.
<mowgli> Nicolai why are your faces allways backwards? <Nicolai> what? ._o <Mertek> He's european. It seems like everyone I've ever met from Europe has used backwards smileys. <Mertek> There's no other way to do D: though. <mowgli> : D <Spazmo> :D != D: <Spazmo> I got laid :D She had herpes D:
<Kanako> That's right kids. Unlike most of the Linux solutions out there, Cinelerra requires no emulation of proprietary operating systems, no commercial add-ons, no banner advertizements, no corporate dependancies, no terrorists, just pure, raw, hot blooded Linux boxes. <Kanako> ^--- It does, however, require walking through hell, fighting Satan himself, and saving the princess in the other room. <Neo1337> Just to find out the princess is in another castle...
DaLady Firestorm: and drinking my tea Laketh 69: teabag? DaLady Firestorm: I like tea DaLady Firestorm: and yes, there is a tea bag in my drink right now Laketh 69: lol DaLady Firestorm: why do you ask Laketh 69: ....... Laketh 69: teabag ;( DaLady Firestorm: do I want to know DaLady Firestorm: what's the fixation with teabag Laketh 69: is when you stick your balls into a girls mouth DaLady Firestorm: did you have a pet tebag... DaLady Firestorm: ...ah... DaLady Firestorm: okay, that explains it DaLady Firestorm: ew... Laketh 69: duh Laketh 69: and u like teabags DaLady Firestorm: I like tea DaLady Firestorm: not the bags DaLady Firestorm: or sacs DaLady Firestorm: or whatever Laketh 69: the bags make the tea DaLady Firestorm: I like what comes out of the tea bags DaLady Firestorm: oh, wait a second
<Kingsford> who is Psytrox? <Turori> rejis's date <Kingsford> an IRC date? <Cockbill_Street> right <Kingsford> you guys should go to #movies <Kingsford> and then, out to #dinner <Kingsford> and later, #backseatofthecar <Rejistania> Are you implying that I should get a life? <Cockbill_Street> you've found that out on your own. ;)
Iridium24: well my lady friend seemed excited to get my number so we'll see DogmaticLaw99: lol DogmaticLaw99: see what she looks like when youre sober Iridium24: i was DD friday night DogmaticLaw99: ahh Iridium24: but i totally know what you mean Iridium24: a year ago feb when i had just turned 21 Iridium24: omg i dont know what the fuck i was thinking Iridium24: she had this GIANT birth mark across her face DogmaticLaw99: lol Iridium24: i didnt notice until i called her up the next day and i picked her up for a date Iridium24: i almost went "holy shit what happened to your face!" Iridium24: and then i saw some pictures and she has clearly had it all her life Iridium24: i was like omg, how many drinks did i have last night! DogmaticLaw99: thats sad bro Iridium24: In conclusion i go to dance clubs sober now
(@[UGP]SirSteam) ITS ALL FUCKING FUNNY TIL YOU ARE MARRIED (@[UGP]SirSteam) THEN THE LAUGHTER FUCKING ENDS GENTLEMEN (@[UGP]SirSteam) BE WARNED (@[UGP]SirSteam) oh hi honey i was just talkin to the gu ?? quit: ([UGP]SirSteam) (~ssmith@SirScoots.user.gamesnet) (Read error: EOF from client)
<Revolution_Man> I want to be launched out of my coffin at my funeral. <RandomMan> hahah <Inferno> Liar. <Revolution_Man> With a tape recording attached to the body saying "I'M STILL ALIVE, CATCH ME!"
<chewy> has anybody an idea where to get torrents of german simpsons episodes? <Whacko> germany
krlgol2: Microsoft has also managed to upset women and entire countries. A Spanish-language version of Windows XP, destined for Latin American markets, asked users to select their gender between "not specified," "male" or "bitch," because of an unfortunate error in translation.
<_dk-> I just grabbed a couple pretzels and sat down at the computer... I bit in to one and realized that not only was it stale, but I wasn't really all that hungry to begin with. But I was too lazy to get up and toss them in the trash, so I ate them anyway... I wonder just how many of the Seven Deadly Sins that qualifies me for...
<ThaNoise> you know i saw something funny last night. an asian guy wearing a jerry rice jersey. was it wrong of me to laugh at an asian persion with "RICE" printed on the back of his shirt?
* Quits: FuTar0 (Quit: and /part were sitting in a tree and / part fell off, who was left?)
<@NeoMinder> Hey cloud! Get off my you! <nightrunner> You ate paint chips as a kid, didn't you? <@NeoMinder> you mean wall candy?
Ross81: my fingers smell like pussy for some reason Battlepoet: uh Ross81: I wonder if mcdonalds has added different spices to their friends and mcnuggets Battlepoet: o.0 Ross81: fries rather Battlepoet: good thing I've got wendy's coming instead
(long conversation about a problem goes here) <Yttak> So, what you want me to do now ? It still doesnt work !!! <TheMTZ> ok - i got the ultimate solution for you now - it will solve it 100 pct. <Yttak> Cool, tell me ! <TheMTZ> Unplug all the cords, put the PC back into the box and bring it back to where you bought it. <Yttak> You mean its broken ? What should i tell them when they ask ? <TheMTZ> Tell them you are too god damn stupid to own a computer and get the money back. * Quits: Yttak (Yttak@xxx.xxx.xxx.xxx)
<Nique> *eyes spam* 'Supersize your penis.' Does that come with fries? <kymscrazy> I want a chocolate shake with mine. <Foenix> I just want no lettuce. * GeekRyuu (Ryuu@12.5.124.207) has joined #subcafe <GeekRyuu> Hi! <GeekRyuu> How is every little thing? <Foenix> We were just talking about supersizing them.
<D1> ugh <D1> they put me on lithium! <sorbix> did they perscribe you batteries <D1> not yet. <D1> but who knows what they'll give me next time.
<imanz> sorry about my server il get it up * absynthe wonders where she's heard THAT before...
<tegu> WANNA PLAY IRC TIC TAC TOE? <tegu> 1 2 3 <slip> K <tegu> 4 5 6 <tegu> 7 <tegu> erm <slip> LOL <tegu> 1 2 3 <tegu> 4 5 6 <tegu> 7 8 9 <tegu> you go first <slip> 1 <tegu> 5 <tegu> UR TURN <slip> 4 <tegu> 7 <slip> 3 <tegu> 2 <slip> 9 <tegu> 8 gg <slip> gg
<_blackcat> in the bash how do I get it so that it will show the all the dirs in a different color? <octalpuss> i believe that's the --gay option
310||slackerr: man, they shut off the water in our building 310||slackerr: its gonna be off the entire day 510||joey: that SUCKS@ 310||slackerr: the worst part is that i took a shit before i knew it was off
<EvolvEarth> /nickserv identify iloveanal <EvolvEarth> FUCK <kupo> How did you know my password?!
isotec: so my dad decides to be nice and put a chocolate on top of my LCD monitor (its one of thoes ones with booze in it isotec: so i come by l8r and im like cool isotec: i pick it up as as i do so it starts to drip on the top of the monitor and some booze leaks out isotec: im thinking well that was totaly smart dad now i have whisky or somthing and chocolate oozing around up there isotec: but im like hey cant let that chocolate go to waste isotec: i start to lick up the tasty mess and when im in mid lick my dad walks in and is like "Jesus son, i know you many like your computer but this is just rediculous!"
<[foreel]Torisutamu> Warning! <[foreel]LagginTimes> Warning: The following commercial may not be suited for young children. <[foreel]LagginTimes> Tired of watching college girls run around like morons and take off their clothes? <[foreel]LagginTimes> Of course you're not! <[foreel]Torisutamu> Tired of those same old girls at those same beaches? We thought not! <[foreel]Torisutamu> Fucker beat me to it
[sides] the other day my aunt and cousins were over my house for the night and them and my family were in the living room [sides] some how we started talking about pamela anderson. my sister was like "well it's not like she's in porn or anything" [sides] and they were all arguing over if she's in porn or not. [sides] I wasn't really paying attention because I was trying to fix my dad's computer, which is in the same room. but I heard them talking about porn so I listened up [sides] and when my sister said "no she's never been in a real porn or anything" [sides] I spoke up and said "oh yes she has!" [sides] everyone looks at me funny and I hadn't realized what I did wrong yet and my dad's like "how do you know that?" [sides] so I just got up and went upstairs.
<JoeDawson> "Tour De France Winner Lance Armstrong was stripped of his title after 3 substances banned by the french were found in his hotel room" <KloA> haha <JoeDawson> The three banned substances... Deoderant, Toothepaste, and soap. <JoeDawson> *rimshot* <JoeDawson> HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA * JoeDawson TEH FUNNAY
<watashi-wa>necrophilia is dead boring <chersucks> wtf?!? <watashi-wa>try incest instead <watashi-wa>it's only relatively boring :p
<neekohh> eh, where should i go? <tzigaite> gamespot by target might give you more <neekohh> gamespot is that place near target right
* elisteran subscribes seriumu to spamlists <elisteran> would you rather get nigerian 419 scams, or hawt lesbian pr0n ? <Pavel> elisteran: As if the two were mutually exclusive. <elisteran> Dear Mr. Smith, my name is Motoba Kwambe, and I am legal counsel representing the family of the late Prime Minister of Nigeria, Bouncy Bubbles. Her nude coed widow has the opportunity to retrieve $15 million stashed away in a bank account, but needs a US citizen to ... <Pavel> elisteran: That works.
<Jetsuo> Ew, Ashlee Simpson is #1 on the Billboards. Jetsuo must go kill a kitten now. <KitBoxPocket> Jetsuo: every time you kill a kitten, God masturbates. <Jetsuo> lmao <KitBoxPocket> You dont want God flogging his holy log, do you? <Nyschashi-Seikun> when god ejaculates, it snows <KitBoxPocket> Oh, snow day, sweet <Jetsuo> and when God craps? <KitBoxPocket> A republican is elected <Jetsuo> XD <KitBoxPocket> "Mommy! Mommy! Every time a Republican gets elected, it means God just had a really great shit!'
<Obiwan> Koreans are kicking ass at men's all around gymnastics... <Obiwan> ....don't ask why I'm watching men's gymnastics.... <Nimdae> you like their tight asses <Obiwan> well they don't show ass that much <Obiwan> their pants are too loose <Obiwan> sigh <Obiwan> actually I turned it on and I saw a korean. <Nimdae> you just proved you are watching their asses
[2nd_law_of_thermodynamics] why are the vaginas always blurred out in hentai? [dsgasdsa] vaginas can bend light [dsgasdsa] 'the black hole' [2nd_law_of_thermodynamics] they must do it just to piss me off [dsgasdsa] it's because you should be focusing on their personality [dsgasdsa] shallow cunt
<Matt-san> Over the hill women have experience. :) <Kataclysm> And saggy boobz <Matt-san> They flop back and forth like mudflaps. <Kataclysm> Thank you for the lovely visual, Matt. <Raiden> Its like when you go to the nursing home <Raiden> and say "SHOW ME YOUR TITS" <Kataclysm> I'm going to kill you now. Please don't take it personal. <Raiden> and they take off their pants
<JonTG> What's more fun than swinging a dead baby around on a rope? <JonTG> Stopping it with a shovel.
<Matrix_McCloud> i can't imagine sticking anything in your mouth farther than like 4 inches <Matrix_McCloud> without puking <Oolong> you have to do it a certain way <Oolong> if you line your throat up right it just slides in <Oolong> or if his schlong is bent downwars <Matrix_McCloud> then if it touches the edge, your nose lights up red and beeps
<Poinky> so, there is to be war between us... <brett1479> war? <p3nt4g0n> huh? <Mororvia> good god ya'll <p3nt4g0n> wha?
<X-G> Yay, I wrote a todo list <X-G> Now I can procrastinate more efficiently!
<monkey216> FUCK! im dead <wrenchy> why? <monkey216> Im sitting here hitting my bong and my dad just imed me from korea and was like, I can see you in the webcam <monkey216> I forgot I had the damned camera turned on <wrenchy> LMAO see you next year dumbass <monkey216> fuck.....
* kitten has quit IRC (Killed (NickOP (Kill requested by kittster))) <BlackAIR> kitten got killed?? <Propagandhi> ALRIGHT, WHO IN HERE IS MASTERBATING!?
<@graspee_leemoor> brazil v italy women's volleyball is about to start <@graspee_leemoor> you'll get no sense out of me * Snaar hands graspee some tissues < Bucket_Mouse> who you cheering for <%Snaar> the girls < Bucket_Mouse> which girls? <%Snaar> you know <%Snaar> two legs <%Snaar> two arms <%Snaar> various holes <%Snaar> THE GIRLS < Bucket_Mouse> ITALY GIRLS OR BRAZIL GIRLS <%Snaar> why are you being racist :- <%Snaar> they are both fine girls < Bucket_Mouse> oh, i thought you were playing favorites <%Snaar> the point of female sports is just to enjoy the show
(@b0wser) i like the fact that she says "we can still arrange fuck dates" even though we're not together (@Bocki) a fuck girlfriend: nothing better then that (@jason127) I had a relationship like that (@jason127) then one day she just disapeared (@jason127) then two years later i seen her in Tatoo magazine (@jason127) she had moved to Ohio (@Bocki) sounds like Forrest Gump - The XXX Version
aakashdheer: my grandmother gave me a wish aakashdheer: i could either have a perfect memory or a huge penis aakashdheer: i can't remember my decision
<bloodeu> Outback Steakhouse has ridiculous prices <bloodeu> i'm here now with my date <bloodeu> palm pilot + wifi is cool <bloodeu> i got my keyboard <jomomma> ...
*** Mavert changes topic to 'Men are like cement... after getting laid, they take a long time to get hard. (EviLGirL-) Women are like a carpet... lay them right the first time and you can walk all over them forever''