<Dante> so this cinco de mayo bullshit right <Dante> all the mexicans go cruising in their lowriders all decked out with beaner crap down a certain avenue here <Brian> haha <Brian> yeah <Brian> that would be today <Dante> so when we got off work, an associate and i <Dante> we went and bought a big fucking french flag <Dante> and berets <Dante> and the french national anthem CD <Dante> and draped the flag over his Charger <Brian> HAHAHA <Dante> and cruised with the mexicans wearing berets and blaring the french anthem <Dante> we got so many bad looks <Dante> and whenever we'd pull up at a stop light <Dante> we'd starting talking about pastries and perfum in french accents to the car next to us
Terron: I told him I was sick Terron: He was all like.. bullshit you're not sick reddkin26: So how'd you get off of work yesterday then? Terron: I said, "I'm fucking my sister, is that sick enough for you mother fucker?" Terron: I got my final paycheck yesterday
amandahirst2007 : why is it that when you ship something by car it's called shipment and when it's shipped by boat it's called cargo Vincent_Valentine9 : Cargo is simply a term to describe something held on a ship, plane, truck or train. It has nothing to do with what the cargo is actually used for. The "Shipment" is an item being moved, it got it's name because back in the day, before cars, ships and boats down rivers and oceans were the main form of travel. Vincent_Valentine9 : When Planes, trains and automobiles began to be used, the term simply carried over. amandahirst2007 : ur stupid. asl? Vincent_Valentine9 : ..........
*** MindWreck (sifu98@ip3e835487.speed.planet.nl) has joined channel #asianpop 11:07 <MindWreck> !list 11:07 <poeham> --- #asianpop :You're not channel operator 11:07 <poeham> :( 11:08 * poeham was ready to kick that time :( 11:08 <poeham> hey you 11:08 <poeham> LEAVE *** MindWreck has left channel #asianpop 11:08 <poeham> $$ 11:08 * poeham is just as effective from the sidelines
<Supamoochu> do you know durex have a guaruntee that their condoms will not get people preggers <Supamoochu> i wonder how they refund <Flamebird> with a free coathanger
<@Aeriana> University union elections next week, there's this candidate <@Aeriana> Her poster is like... <@Aeriana> It says "people + vision = change" <@Aeriana> I'm thinking..... <@Aeriana> It doesn't equals change, it will return a data type mismatch.
<Tigwa> how funny would it be if you got held-up by a tshirt ninja <Tigwa> 'can you describe the man?' 'errr....well he looked like he had a ninja hood made from a tshirt, was very pale and thin, and kept yelling i will haxx0r j00'
* kipton is listening to cute gay boy jacking of in his underwear :: 13s <sprite>... <kipton> the description is misleading
<Bubbaprog> sweet <Bubbaprog> my posters came from the museum of modern art <Bubbaprog> three huuuge art prints, magritte and miro, for 20 buckls shipped <Bubbaprog> you should see the giant bazooka they came in <Bubbaprog> it's like a tampon applicator for rosie o'donnell
<Otakutard> Dude... if you put the words "I want to have sex with you until the sun goes down." into a translator, and translate it into Dutch, then back to english <Otakutard> it comes out <Otakutard> I want slaughtered with you have to the sun decrease. <Otakutard> Kinky dutchlanders
* The_Epitome [Playing]: [Enya - Only Time] [3:40][3.36MB] <Ochre> Enya? My father loves that Enya song at the end of LoTR <Ochre> but usually by the end of the movie he's drunk as a post, so He'll pretty much listen to anything
<@knucklz> and i was going to make a joke about the shit i just took <@knucklz> but it was corny
[+Hobbes] I was driving by a church on the way home and on the message board out front it said "Under new management"
<SuperKing> 90% of men kiss their wife goodbye when they leave the house. <SuperKing> The rest kiss their house goodbye when they leave the wife.
<vai> My mom is like, deathly afraid of worms and she saw one on the sidewalk <vai> so she made me go get it and she went inside the house, so I went in the house with the worm in my hand <vai> and she yelled my name and told me to get rid of it, so I threw it outside I came in the house <vai> she called me an asshole and a son of a bitch <vai> so I was like "son of a bitch?" she said "shut up, you're adopted go away" <vai> =(
<icekickr> i think i made my mom wonder why she ever had me <icekickr> she told me she was going to a couples shower <icekickr> so i said, "oh a gangbang" <icekickr> i guess its times like that
<CharColt64> I think when you get a roaming charge a lil icon should pop up, of a guy gettin fucked in the ass
<Sholin> You know, I went to KFC the other day with my Mother, And she asked them if they had anything fried..
<Kaelic> I know the trick to talking to girls <Twinge> Just run up to her and say "DIGGGGITTAALLLL PANNNNTTTSSSSS.... ACTIVATE!" <Kaelic> Wtf? <Kaelic> Might as well say "Go Go Gadget Penis!"
<Mendo> lmao there's a wicked lookign spider on my monitor and if i move the mouse around he chases after it <spitfire> haha mendo <spitfire> take a screen shot <spitfire> wait <spitfire> that made no sense
<Flamebird> i was watching Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon the other night.. and i was wondering where all the tigers and dragons are <Flamebird> then i realised they're all crouching and hidden <Flamebird> :/
<raven> Any cat people here? I've got a problem with Nicky... <Leth> I've been known to be handy with a wok <Lore> Why, I'm a cat person. <raven> I took Morgan to the vet yesterday - he was gone for a total of 45 minutes, got two vaccs and a blood draw. <raven> Brought him home and Nicky went BALLISTIC. <raven> Spent the rest of the night yowling and hissing and attacking MOrgan. <CrazyClimber> nicky smells the hospital smells on morgan <Lore> Yeah, I've seen that happen. <raven> Is there anything I can do to get the hospital stink off him, then? Pack his carrier in coffe grounds or something? <tieboy> how about a bath <CrazyClimber> just give it a day or so <Lore> We tried catnip and butter, and neither worked. <agent_orange> butter? <agent_orange> you buttered your cat? <Lore> Yes. <raven> it's the best way to butter the house. <raven> Cats are effective butter delivery units. <Lore> We read somewhere to put butter on a cat's forehead. <agent_orange> did the emolient facilitate insertion? <Lore> And the other cat licks it off, and likes the first cat, because it tastes like butter. <Lore> As I said, it didn't work. <agent_orange> you read sopmewhere to put butter on the cats foreWHAT THE FUCK WERE YOU THINKING <tieboy> rub the two cats together vigorously until they smell like each other <agent_orange> piss on them both at the same time <tieboy> KITTY TASTES LIKE BUTTER <raven> It's more fun to put tape on their feet. <agent_orange> why not do both <agent_orange> and then get out the handycam <Lore> I believe what I was thinking was "Maybe it will work. And even if it doesn't, I get to butter the cat's forehead." <agent_orange> AFHV would *love* some footage of sticky-pawed, freshly buttered cats trying in vain to avoid a stream of steaming miller lite <Samwise> You know what helps with feuding cats, Lore? Sending me lots of cash. <agent_orange> now, see, I read somewhere -- <agent_orange> I think it was leviticus <agent_orange> -- that what you should do is frost them <agent_orange> betty crocker, right out of the can <raven> Chocolate or buttercream? <Leth> rave: go chocolate, buttercreme isn't pareve <CrazyClimber> you're frosting meat? <agent_orange> and then there'a always Cat Wellington <agent_orange> "What are you doing in the kitchen, dear?" "Just buttering the cat, pumpkin!" <agent_orange> "Why don't you baste the chicken while you're at it, too, dear?" "Baste the ... *light bulb* ...Sure! Sure, I'll 'baste the chicken'!" <CrazyClimber> a google images search for "buttered cat" returns a picture of isaac hayes <agent_orange> chocolate salty cat balls
WC128: OMFG that pizza was orgasmic WC128: it was as if God and Jesus and Mary just bukakked into my mouth
SuprJmpmanCarp00: I can't be the only one who finds it funny that KFC dumped Jason Alexander for their ads in favor of a room full of black people
<xi> my parents sent me a fucking text message to tell me they put my dog down today
<Cedaie> Your ignorance isn't helping. <@KTottE> How am I ignorant? <Cedaie> <@KTottE> Do it again, do it right - Ooh great help *clap* *clap* <@KTottE> http://dictionary.reference.com/search?q=ignorant <@KTottE> Maybe the word you were searching for was http:// dictionary.reference.com/search?q=arrogant ? <Cedaie> yeah thats the one <Cedaie> Your arrogance isn't helping, <@KTottE> Neither is your ignorance
<ThatOneDude> the last time somone listened to a Bush, a bunch of people wandered in the desert for 40 years
<Shockster> Did you hear about that woman that smoked dope in the streets of Baghdad? She was so stoned.
<Calisa> When I was little I always wanted little people that could fit in the palm of my hand. <JPGumby> they are called 'employees'
<FuriousC> listening to music no one else cares about doesnt make you cool, its just means you're a ska fan
garrett8675309: heard you threatened to shoot my girlfriend... imptacular: yeah garrett8675309: you should get your membership card in 7-10 days
<DeadMansHand> haha, last night, me and pete went out to celebrate his engagement and got hugely drunk <DeadMansHand> we got this great idea to bury eachother in the sand close to the water and see who would chicken out first <DeadMansHand> took about a half hour, but the water got up to my face so i freaked and got out <DeadMansHand> i looked around for pete and he must've chickened out before me and stumbled home or something heh <DeadMansHand> What'd he say when he woke up this morning? <Thirteen-> uhh.. he hasn't come home yet.. i thought he was staying with you? <DeadMansHand> holy fuck. <DeadMansHand> i fucking hope im wrong about what im thinking right now <DeadMansHand> im fucking going back to the beach to make sure <DeadMansHand> if he gets home, call me, i don't want to be worrying about this <Thirteen-> will do. you better hope he's not still buried, you'll be in deep shit. quit: (DeadMansHand) <Tyran> wtf? pete came home last night you fuck. Ken's going to be worrying about this shit all day <Thirteen-> haha yea, but it will be fun while it lasts join: (PeteRepeat) (bob@3F8C4655.11D1C8C.18637D35.IP) <PeteRepeat> fucking ken <PeteRepeat> ken... that fucker buried me in the sand last night, i ran off about 5 minutes to it, left him there to be an idiot <quiqsilver> pete, ken didn't come back last night, i thought he was with you. <PeteRepeat> oh fuck. <PeteRepeat> if ken shows up, make sure he doesn't know that im at the beach digging for his body. i don't want him to think i care or anything. quit: (PeteRepeat) <Thirteen-> rofl. Those 2 are going to get a huge surprise when they meet at the beach. <Tyran> i can't beleive how perfect their timing was
<Mouldy_Llama> ok, I will come clean <Mouldy_Llama> I only said I got with the chicken to look cool
<flowerfrenzy> i went to one of my elementary school dances to find out what it was all about. it was stupid. <flowerfrenzy> we had to dance like five feet away from the guy <okto> haha! <okto> "leave room for Jesus!"
<Sukato> Once again <Sukato> my firewall successfully blocked hack attempt from 192.168.0.1 <Sukato> Then some programs get kicked offline <Jed> I know that IP address <Jed> He's a mean bastard.
<rellekmr> i'm all for promoting abstinence <rellekmr> the more people who are abstinant the less pathetic i look :)
(f`CNK) so lets say im driving (f`CNK) and sum1 yells in my fucking ear (f`CNK) i wont lose concentration man (f`CNK) neither would u! (f`CNK) we are like superman (Alchemeron) superman doesn't drive a car, you fucking idiot, he can fly
<Kyr> When i was in psychiatry it was so funny when the psychologist tried to make me do this Rorschach test. I said "that's a Rorschach test innit?" and he was like "yeah but you're not supposed to know that. Now the test 'll be useless" <Kyr> So I said the drawings looked like dead people and vaginas to console the guy.
<KainSularei> I wish that it was possible to edit car honks <KainSularei> sometimes someone tries to cut me off, but i always see it coming and speed ahead of them <KainSularei> So I'm thinking I get some LOTR Gandalf bumper sticker on my back bumper <KainSularei> I'd like to be able to hit the steering wheel and have them hear this booming "YOU SHALL NOT PASS!" as I go by
<Bludywar> can ne one get me a cdkey for counter strike <Bludywar> a working one <Rhyth> Go and buy a copy of hl? <Bludywar> I got one <Bludywar> my boy ate the fucking cd key <Bludywar> he took the sticker part off and ate it <Rhyth> :/ <Bludywar> can you give me the cdkey? <Bludywar> can ne one give me a cdkey tho <Bludywar> for counter strike <Rhyth> Your boy ate it? <Bludywar> ya <Rhyth> That's the most absurd excuse for not having a cdkey ever.
<Evilution> I bought these heinous (but somewhat loveable) underwear today, a silver-metallic snakeskin-boxer.. and when I'm at the register the clerk says 'are you serious? I wouldn't even buy those.. and I'm gay..'
<odd> last night i dreamt about being in Rio de Janiero. <odd> the funny thing is, i've dreamt about being in Rio before, and in this dream I said to myself, "wow, it's just like in my dreams."
Quit: (+[WG]sPiKie) (Math problems? Call 1-800-[(10x)(13i)^2]- [sin(xy)/2.362x].)
<timmo> today i found out <timmo> that this girl who was a consistant cock tease to me <timmo> has cancer <timmo> some reason i find that karma is at work here
<broox> so my speakers haven't beeen working for a while <broox> they were plugged into the mic port <npl> umm, i think they are color-coded <broox> haha, i know <broox> i usually just reach back there and guess which hole it is * npl has set the topic on channel #cell6 to <broox> i usually just reach back there and guess which hole it is
<Max> I went to donate some money to bash.org today <Max> I clicked the Paypal Donate button, and it comes up with the message: <Max> Bash.org Paypal Donation attempt #56489 pending <Max> *two minutes later* <Max> Bash.org Paypal Donation attempt #56489 rejected