<kevin> Good Morning, nigga! <kronix> ... <Dinyctis> good morning to YOU, niggaaaaaaaaaaa! <kevin> lmao <kronix> Dinny is a wigger *** kronix was kicked by jark (Unallowed word/phrase - wigger [#38492])
EKBoney: You've got the cat from hell, I've got a dog that doubles as a mop and vacuum EKBoney: Maybe we can genetically clone them together and have a cat-dog-satanic-vacuum-mop! EKBoney: They'd sell great in the market! Trumpeter085: praise satan & clean your floors!
<DTARD> you havent peaked until youve had a conversation wth the light barely shining through the comfortor draped over your head while hanging off the top bunk and wearing plastic vampire teeth
<KJ> I was in a shop in Britain, when an American tourist in front of me tried to pay for something in US dollars. The shop keeper politely told her that this was Britain, and you can't use U.S. dollars here. The lady replied... "But I had no problems in other third world countries"
<@voh> ever seen the bristol flag in my room? <@voh> it's about 80 cm wide and 300cm long <@voh> big-ass flag :) < SirGoblin> sounds like my penis <@voh> yeah <@voh> the flag refuses to stand up straight as well
Customer: "I CAN'T READ OR RECEIVE EMAIL! HELP!" We're only allowed to reply through email, so I almost deleted it. But I reconsidered. Tech Support: "Yes you can."
<kw> I associate Chanel 5 with old women, my grandma used to wear it <kw> (so, needless to say.. I find it quite erotic)
ritilan: and in 2 years u can have your first drink Halo: Yeah, I cant wait! Halo: Because I've never had any alcohol before, honest. ritilan: i belive u Halo: Then you are gullible ritilan: yes well there is that too Halo: Because let me tell ya, I'm a pretty raging alcoholic ritilan: i find it helps to keep the voices in my head quite ritilan: at least i think it does Halo: I sing show tunes to myself in order to keep the voices in check ritilan: is bad when they all sing along Halo: Yeah, I just refuse to go along when they try that shit Halo: Then I yell "DONT MAKE ME TURN THIS CAR AROUND"
<_Nathan> thats a lot of licenses you bought viss ;) <visionz> yeah <visionz> cost me 3 arms and a dozen legs <visionz> living near a cemetary rox :)
<@f0dd|away> !topic #ol - guns don't kill people; I kill people *** nuff0r changes topic to '#ol - guns don't kill people; I kill people' <Kwazy> Guns kill people, but at least THEY dont rape them afterwards <Kwazy> *sick grin*
<AleX> i guess this channel must be a center of activity; when i not rarondn an;sc;ln vialmnv,ma v,xznm f dlJFSMSMMMSMMSM:HHHFRRF <DerianX> Yes. <AleX> sorry, i stopped caring halfway through that sentnece
<GodsJiva> cloning should be allowed! <f0dder> cloning is bad <f0dder> cause there's too many errors <GodsJiva> but... if they dont practise, there will always be errors! <f0dder> just stick to animals at least <GodsJiva> yeah, to start with <Koding_W> aye. stick to animals. <Koding_W> thats my motto.
Scarface8393: i was just looking at the bottle of cooking oil because im making spaghetti and i was wondering. what is extra virgin? is that like never ever gonna get laid?
<@Splodge`> I think there might be some incest in my family because my dad's cock tastes exactly like my sister's snatch.
<The-Jim> Next time I fly British Airways I'm gonna steal the little knife, fork and spoon, they're like 2/3rd the size of normal ones, gonna keep them in my bag. <xace> do it <xace> then when people try to make you use a spork <xace> be like <xace> FUCK YOU I HAVE MINI FORK, KNIFE, AND SPOON
<Shawn_Michaels> u no, the moon landing was fake, right? <t3hpwn> Only in the US will you find people who think the moon landing was fake and wrestling is real... * Shawn_Michaels kicks t3hpwn in the nads <t3hpwn> The truth hurts, eh?
<aBoijj> just realised I'd set the web cache on my proxy to 1TB instead of the 1GB I thought I'd set it to <aBoijj> the machine only has a 4.3GB drive
[ LopeDogg ] u know warren [ LopeDogg ] he always talks about weed affecting him [ LopeDogg ] questioning whether it does or not [ LopeDogg ] then he said he went to muyi tai once [ LopeDogg ] stoned [ LopeDogg ] and took a piss [ LopeDogg ] then as he walked away from the urinal he wanted to flush it [ LopeDogg ] so he pressed his alarm remote [ LopeDogg ] then when it didnt flush he was like what the fuck
<Sugoi-Cless> Lat! what have I told you about eating packets of gravy you find in parking lots!? <Latino|Working> the same thing you told me about peeing in the sink cless <Latino|Working> "its fine if no ones around"
<Guardian_Latino> manboobs give girls something to look at when they're talking to you
Lawyer-Acidbuk has 11 fingers <Lawyer-Acidbuk> 10 on my hand and one....*shuts up* <LatinoReheat> up your ass?
* yugi--moto[A] is now known as yugi--moto <Candy> jsfd;'fd <yugi--moto> hgfnkhgf <Candy> klfsd;aiou;sda <yugi--moto> gjfnhmgfhgf;hxfg <Candy> klsdfj;asljfiosausfd <yugi--moto> jknbjk <Candy> lkjsafjl;dsajfsadfoiusafp <yugi--moto> fm,gnhdkln ,dfznl,df hf <Candy> asldkjfl;kdsa <yugi--moto> jfgbhdfjbf <Candy> Be Right Back <yugi--moto> ok <yugi--moto> =
<Innocent_ASK> Spike from Buffy is my ideal man! <BishiGartt> he's the male version of Cher <BishiLatino> only with less penis and more makeup
<ironfrost> life sucks <Majji-woo-woo> so do whores <Latino|NotIn> but life sucks for free
<Latino_Reheat> where would us anime fans be without masturbation? probably married by now.......
<MEGA-Shrike> lat you off my xmas card list <MEGA-Shrike> you now on another list <LatinoReheat> list of "Who to make love to before im 30"? <MEGA-Shrike> THE LIST OF ALMIGHTY PUNISHMENT, PAIN, DEATH AND GENERAL NASTINESS <LatinoReheat> so shrike, the "Who to make love to before im 30"? then
<Pinkie2> some guy pissed me off today so i sat on my scanner to send him picture of my ass and the glass broke i just got back from getting 15 stictches <Louey> pinkie you serious? <Pinkie2> yup <Dk__> lol <Louey> and what was your excuse at the hospital? <Dk__> you had a really bad day <Pinkie2> sittin on one cheek right now <Pinkie2> i told em i sat on a drinkin glass my kid put on chir <Louey> ahhh <Dk__> we'll probably be seeing flatbeds with weight restrictions now on <Dk__> or warning labels, do not sit on glass <Pinkie2> hehe <Pinkie2> im gonna sue <Louey> and now your out a scanner and no retribution for the fuck who made you sit on your scanner <Pinkie2> next time i will just shit on the scanner and send that to him <Dk__> ROFL <Dk__> good idea <Louey> haha <|Korombos> Pinkie2 Sometimes man, it is best to remain quiet and thought a fool, than to do what you did, open your mouth and remove all doubt! <Dk__> heh <Louey> kor=confuscious <Dk__> a inspirational quote from kor
<ROM_Man> can anyone point me to a resource on how to deal with shadow passwords in perl? <ROM_Man> anyone alive? <\mjd> <rattle> Who dares to disturb my eternal rest? <\mjd> <clank> <clank> <clank>
<Mutiny> I'm having this teeny problem and I want to know if somebody can help me with it.. <mjd> mutiny: Sever the main neck tendons before cutting through the spinal cord. That will allow you more opportunity to separate the vertebrae prior to removing the head.
<Murr> DrForr, presumably the tank crew *knew* how to swim, but not how to escape from a tank with open hatch that had turned on its roof before sinking. <DrForr> The tank flipped over -then- sank? Now that's rich. <arkuat> what is this about? cisco is building tanks now? <Winkola> arkuat: If they do, you can count on a lot of drowned newbie net admins. <Winkola> "To report a drowning emergency, press 1, and hold for 27 minutes."
* [petey suspects I-Que of not being 1337! <I-Que> I'm only 22! <I-Que> not 1337
<q[merlyn]> lem... know any good austin Perl hackers for hire? <q[merlyn]> I'm on a hunt for one for a friend. <archon> for a job? <Stupid_> No, in his spare time merlyn bow-hunts for perl programmers by their scent.
<Tkil> chaos_ -- oh... and if you're a beginner... don't worry overmuch about efficiency. <billn> if I wanted efficency, I'd put bigger tires on my truck, so I could get the whole cat in one pass.
*** sonic_1 (rick@highlife.net) has joined channel #perl <sonic_1> can someone tell me whats wrong with this script? <sonic_1> #!/usr/bin/perl <sonic_1> for $x in 'ls --width=1'; <sonic_1> do 'mv $x ~$x/Mailbox;chown $x.mail ~$x/Mailbox'; <sonic_1> fi
-|- mode/#pwot [+u Snoof] by ChanServ <Umaro> * ChanServ sets mode: +fu Snoof <Snoof> :'( <Umaro> sorry =/ <Snoof> that's the most action i've seen all week
<Blum> I was with a girl once and she pointed and laughed. She said "Who do you think you're going to satisfy with THAT?" <Blum> I said "Me"
<+HackerDragon>: uhmmm yeah I had some lube and "other objects" wrapped up in a towel under my bed. My mom decided that she was going to be nice and do my laundry for me today cause she is home sick. Yeah I just looked under my bed and the lube with objects is there but no towel...
<`Riku> nighty night, don't let the bed bugs bite your head clean off and shit into your neck.
<Gil_AFK> i hate stuff that works for ages without probs and suddenly dies without a single error message or anything. <ElctroJkr> like senior citizens
[+JM_LOL8] Good thing I have LOTS of HD [@Tabitha] My penis is bigger than your HD. [@Tabitha] We should all merge our penises into one big, superpenis.
<Ryan> Wind Waker sucks. <Ryan> Seriously. <Aduin> RYAN <Aduin> DIE! <Ryan> Aduin. <Jesper> Ryan: You suck. Literally. Aduin told me all about it. <+Legion> Ryan, you are incorrect. <Ryan> Nevermind.. <+Legion> WW rules ass. <Ryan> No, i'm not <+Legion> Tell me why it sucks. <Aduin> GO LEG! <+Legion> And if you say graphics, you die. <Jesper> I think the graphics look better. <+Legion> Jesper, me too. :) <Ryan> No, everything about the game sucks, not just the graphics * Quits: Ryan (Ryan@cloak-2236C47B.dyn.optonline.net) (Killed (Jesper (YOU SAID GRAPHICS)))
<[CMF]O-Face|wurk> uhm, I never thought that "I am BREADMAN! With the POWER TO EAT A SLICE OF BREAD IN 1.9 SECONDS!!! - would be a valued superhero power. <Commando^> Superheros have gone downhill recently
<timovgod> Man, when I saw they said they were going to add color to the $20 bill I thought the meant they were replacing Jackson with Al Sharton
<Icedude> you know what pisses me off? when morpheus was jumping for the helicopter in the matrix, agent smith uses a wallhack! THIS IS NOT CS, ITS THE MATRIX! GET YOUR FACTS RIGHT AGENT!
<Scoteh> Im depressed <wizzer> why? <Scoteh> I realised I have more money in an mmorpg than in real life.... <wizzer> Ah......
<Japhro> cams: think you can try and mention e3 a few more times, I don't think I ignored you enough the first few times.
<Knives-> MY MODEM KEEPS DESYNCING. * Knives- kicks the modem <Knives-> I'll call the ISP <Knives-> They'll tell me "It must be something you've installed" <Knives-> And I'll go "INSTALLING SOMETHING THAT DESYNCS A MODEM IS LIKE INSTALLING SOMETHING THAT BLOWS UP A PS/2 MOUSE! " <Knives-> And then they'll blame the phone company. <Knives-> And I'll say FUCK IT. <Knives-> And wait until it fixes itself. <Knives-> There - saved my self the bother and money of calling those pricks.