hQDB :: hacker Quote Database

Network Stats: 21142 Approved Quotes | 1 in Moderation Queue
#35764 [ + | - ] 257
<Celestar> They have found an enourmous security hole in
Microsofts VPN implementation on all Win2000 and WinXP
versions
<RichiH> Celestar: did they have enough free space on the bug
list to add it?
#35763 [ + | - ] 106
<[DI]Indefinate> lan party = lots of pr0n = full hdd = fucked
computer = no pr0n to watch = disaster!
#35761 [ + | - ] 1260
<+starry_eyed_surprise> why do girls have to have a pic to be
proven female??
<@Storm_Queen> Because this is the internet.
<@Storm_Queen> Unless proven otherwise, you are a 50yr old man
with a bucket of KFC in one hand and your penis in the other.
#35756 [ + | - ] 230
<Andy> sorry about leaving abruptly before :) the ice cream
van went past the house and then the power went out :)
<speice> what the Ice-cream van took out the power line??
<UFO6> nah, the rush of overweight kids to the van?
<Andy> Hehe ;)
<UFO6> i saw a kid put a dent into a car from running into it
once...
<UFO6> man, you would think his head was rubber from the way
he bounced off.
#35754 [ + | - ] 188
<usunoro> it's not small it's just more efficient
#35748 [ + | - ] 320
<ESPzetec> maybe you were swapped at birth?
<zeen> maybe your mom had an abortion but you wouldn't die
#35746 [ + | - ] 639
<GoteN80> the headline in the paper tonight
<GoteN80> Suicidal twin kills sister by mistake!
#35743 [ + | - ] 115
<LemonTea> i have no desire to see a real person nude
#35729 [ + | - ] 135
<Hugo> BRB.. Grilling some butterflies.
#35720 [ + | - ] 551
[+Duds] brb phonesex
[+Duds] well not really
[+Duds] depends who answers i suppose
#35712 [ + | - ] 378
<l0g1c> Does giving handjobs make you go blind??
<ApOkAliPs> well...depends where you aim it...
#35672 [ + | - ] 143
<@mewse> fraggle have you done nfs
<@fraggle> no
<@fraggle> is it a good high
#35634 [ + | - ] 1222
<WillaCuz> everyone that rides in my car says 'i feel lik im
in the batmobile'
<pagan> thats cuz you wear that fucking rediculouse outfit
#35602 [ + | - ] 159
<timmo> as soon as i think people might not be retarded
<timmo> everyone goes and fucks up my faith in people
#35578 [ + | - ] 163
<Ice_raven> two reasons to like ICQ
<Ice_raven> 1. it's fucking eleet when you have a bot named
Erica make pseudo-cyber-sex with you
<Ice_raven> 2. when you get messages like [@#$]S?dl?nder (8:44
PM) are you from afganistan
#35567 [ + | - ] 472
<kisa> GET DRESSES, WE'RE LEAVING IN 2 MINUTES!!!
<Stalker> WHERE are you going?
<kisa> DRESSED, DRESSED DAMMIT!
#35566 [ + | - ] 228
<eyesore> the most mmorpg im looking forward to is SWG
<milk> so you can be a loser in a galaxy far far away?
#35524 [ + | - ] 112
<ToddBored> FF11 is gonna suck, its gonna be MMORPG but on PS2
<ToddBored> will kill the whole fantasy part of the series,
cuz there will be idiots in it
<ToddBored> naming themselves kewldude, and kingpimpmaster
<ToddBored> i dunno why they did it...
<ToddBored> im serious dude
<ToddBored> its not gonna have a story line to get into
<ToddBored> cuz all youre gonna hear is Lololo!!L!11 j000 got
owned
<ToddBored> i roxx at FF11
#35522 [ + | - ] 767
<_rm> xp is great
<_rm> better than fucking me or 98
#35521 [ + | - ] 579
<_sho_> Did you hear about the dyslexic guy who walked into a
bra?
<RichiH> _sho_: that was so bad, it hurt
#35494 [ + | - ] 240
Mike: you don't need anything to score in college
Mike: it's like wandering around in a dark forest
Mike: eventually you hit a tree.
#35483 [ + | - ] 357
<nzc> mmmmm
<nzc> Speak n Spall.
<nzc> (i never owned one, by the way.)
<drwiii> obviously not.
#35482 [ + | - ] 660
*** Z is now known as Zfuckinherself
<Zfuckinherself> brb
<Fr0gFucknBwanasMom> hmm
<Fr0gFucknBwanasMom> either she's masturbating, or signing up
for a Capital One Visa card
#35479 [ + | - ] 194
(sorry about the timestamps... they're required for
appreciation of the quote.)

[22:07] * JeremiahSmith falls down and dies.
[22:12] <Howard> Let's not all rush him to the cryokit at
once...
#35467 [ + | - ] 336
MysteriousPepit0: if you were an animal
MysteriousPepit0: what would you be?
InMediasRes1111: horny
#35460 [ + | - ] 259
<DrNick668> the guy that used to live at my house is
subscribed to the far eastern economic review and he didn't
get it forwarded to his new adress
<DrNick668> i like gettin free stuff, but couldn't he be a
pervert instead of an investor?
#35458 [ + | - ] 405
<dinarchvs> man
<dinarchvs> i should buy condoms
<abraham> why?
<abraham> your hand have an STD?
#35457 [ + | - ] 375
<iretd> BTW, when you see 'TS' in a movie pr0n header, it
stands for 'transexual' or 'transvestite'.
<dalias> hahaha iretd
<techlord> heh
<dalias> did you learn that the hard way?
<iretd> dalias, sure did. Was hard intended pun? :)
<iretd> There was something more to that chick. Couldn't quite
put my finger on it. And then there it was. Something I
wouldn't wanna put my finger on.
#35449 [ + | - ] 285
<NetherMagic> i always tape my screwed up CDs on the walls of
my room, so when ppl walk by my house they'll go blind and get
hit by a car
#35446 [ + | - ] 131
<@Sicarius123> .::fnp[sleep]::. winzip can suck my balls
<+fnp[sleep]> Sicarius123, darn tootin
<Joelz> It can?
<Joelz> It should be called winunzip
#35433 [ + | - ] 477
<RQ> im gonan go in and tweak with it again
<RQ> gonna!
<ZephyrX> gonan
<RQ> hehe
<ZephyrX> the pre-pubescent barbarian
<RQ> LMAO
#35423 [ + | - ] 517
<RoboHak> I need a bigger lap, two laptops don't fit very well
<mynuts> "... and thats where human evolution turned south"
#35417 [ + | - ] 268
<Delirium> AFK, tornado
*** Delirium quit irc: (no route to house)
#35413 [ + | - ] 23
(@Klarth): Vapr is just out of tune
(@Klarth): The staff on his quarter note is too short
(Vapr): Your half note became a quarter note
(Vapr): after i cut it in half
(@Klarth): O_o
(@Klarth): And Ochanomizu is a whole note since she has no
staff
(@Klarth): o_O
#35411 [ + | - ] 170
<xeria> cd disretard what i just sent you
<xeria> disREGARD
#35382 [ + | - ] -37
<woz> wouldn't it be great if they renamed scotland -
scatland
#35378 [ + | - ] 220
<ASk> ads make the baby jesus cry
<CitizenErased> PLAGIARISM
<ASk> You can't own baby jesus, he's under GPL
#35373 [ + | - ] 504
<Snow> Heard outside construction site on way to lunch:
<Snow> <sound that a nail gun makes> "AAAAAAAAAAAAH!"
#35367 [ + | - ] 1165
*** StukaWORK has signed off IRC (Ping timeout)
*** kfs has signed off IRC (*.net *.split)
*** X has signed off IRC (*.net *.split)
*** beaucoup has signed off IRC (*.net *.split)
*** Resonator has signed off IRC (*.net *.split)
*** Valken has signed off IRC (*.net *.split)
*** ^PCP^ has signed off IRC (*.net *.split)
*** bitkid has signed off IRC (*.net *.split)
*** |dirge| has signed off IRC (*.net *.split)
*** Broken_ has signed off IRC (*.net *.split)
*** Pat has signed off IRC (*.net *.split)
*** kuruption has signed off IRC (*.net *.split)
*** pahn has signed off IRC (*.net *.split)
*** homer has signed off IRC (*.net *.split)
*** sewshi has signed off IRC (*.net *.split)
*** kyozz has signed off IRC (*.net *.split)
*** neph has signed off IRC (*.net *.split)
*** DemigodDa has signed off IRC (*.net *.split)
*** NDPTAL85 has signed off IRC (*.net *.split)
*** fugu has signed off IRC (*.net *.split)
*** Kintanon has signed off IRC (*.net *.split)
*** daBouncer has signed off IRC (*.net *.split)
*** dre^ has signed off IRC (*.net *.split)
*** mage- has signed off IRC (*.net *.split)
*** gear has signed off IRC (*.net *.split)
*** isteph has signed off IRC (*.net *.split)
*** homer- has signed off IRC (*.net *.split)
*** macie has signed off IRC (*.net *.split)
*** saitan has signed off IRC (*.net *.split)
*** cv has signed off IRC (*.net *.split)
*** slardy has signed off IRC (*.net *.split)
*** sceeter has signed off IRC (*.net *.split)
*** framework has signed off IRC (*.net *.split)
*** dAS- has signed off IRC (*.net *.split)
*** eric|feh has signed off IRC (*.net *.split)
babaobuey: well, ok
babaobuey: that was like watching lemmings run off a cliff or
something
#35358 [ + | - ] 191
<DogWelder> Hrmmm... Norton says that I've contracted a virus,
and should disable needle sharing. Is this bad?
#35342 [ + | - ] 469
<Kaladam> I just heard somebody scream "WHAT THE FUCK" down
the hall from me
<Kaladam> some dudes roommate jizzed on his face
#35339 [ + | - ] 284
<kuruption> OMG I HATE LINUX USERS
<kuruption> this guys gave me a shell on his box
<kuruption> and vi is symlinked to pico!
#35331 [ + | - ] 411
<boxed> "duh, do they have their own dollars in europe? I was
to canada once, and they had their own dollars! can you
believe that?"
<boxed> note that that's an actual quote from some people my
dad met in the US once
#35316 [ + | - ] 125
<h3123t1c> we at IRC protection use AOL often
<h3123t1c> it more organized
<_Godless_> Of course, because .5k/s, constant drop-offs and
and $24 for a sub$10 service is "organized"
#35307 [ + | - ] 221
<Night> bitches fall for everything.
<CptPlanet> i know. dumb sluts.
<Night> it's genetic that they are cuter and stupider.
<CptPlanet> yeah. it's because cute smart chicks don't like to
fuck, and dumb ugly chicks don't get hit on.
<CptPlanet> natural selection.
#35287 [ + | - ] -11
<PeteParker> Microsoft Bob is the default shell for Windows
2000.
#35279 [ + | - ] 118
<Upth> AvatarADV: Having scripts is an advantage over having
to do it by ear.
<AvatarADV> Yeah, in the same way as having your -wife-
gang-raped is an advantage because you don't have to
impregnate her yourself, I guess...
#35212 [ + | - ] 27
< BD-Calvin> an iso in 10 minutes. vr00m
< SnowKrash> =)
< NeilOfDoom> BD-Calvin :: yeah, go easy on the kazaa pr0n
#35178 [ + | - ] 216
<@Deosyne> Yeah. I'm not admitting to anyone, especially my
kid, that I stuck a vacuum in my ass
#35163 [ + | - ] 226
[+escobar] just found out my grandma watches porn
[+escobar] something is serious wrong in the world