<beaker> > MR IP MASTER : OURS FIREWALLS WERE DETECTING A LOT OF TRYINGS TO VIOLATE <beaker> > THE SECURITY OF OURS SYSTEMS FROM THE NEXT IP UNDER YOUR DOMAIN <beaker> > ADMINISTRATOR <beaker> > <beaker> > WE WAIT FOR AN INMEDIATLY SOLUTION
<LoverMan> Yeah, I remember when my boss' wife had computer problems...she asked me to go over and help fix it, she wasn't seeing anything on the screen and has rebooted, checked the connections, etc...so I go over there <LoverMan> And the monitor wasn't turned on. Her excuse? "Oh, I never turn it off so I didn't think to check that."
<kavonr> our new senior unix sysadmin can't change the ip address on a sun workstation.
<RoadRuner> mail1 procmail[15005]: Error while writing to "/ dev/null" <RoadRuner> on my mail server at cisco
* Efudd names his new firewall box "cannabis" <Efudd> It's a gateway box! <Efudd> To Other Bad Networks.
<DWildstar> ARRRCH <DWildstar> i told a guy at work where to find a password for a server so he finds it then fucking privmsg's it to me on irc "is this it? "
<lammah> getting your own AS: $250 setting up your own network: $100k having your upstream forward your stupid request to NANOG: priceless <lammah> Dear Peers/Colleagues, <lammah> We will start to announce a new prefix: <lammah> AS13197 192.168.0.0/16 <lammah> Please update your filters. <lammah> Thanks, <lammah> Reinder van Amerongen, <lammah> Junior. System/Network Adminstrator and Senior Cabling consultant.
<FlashMan> nethack is installed <Jon2> An IRC chick stands in your path. She wears a +5 ring of decreased mental stability. * sQurl kicks jon2 <sQurl> I AM STABLE GOD DAMN YOU <sQurl> DON'T MAKE ME KILL YOU <Jon2> The IRC chick attacks. She misses.
<depresso> Compaq FAQ: Where is the ANY Key? (FAQ2859) <depresso> This is not a key. When you are instructed to press any key, this means you can press any of the keys on the keyboard (such as the Enter key, the R key, or the space bar).
<depresso> *** Notice -- K-line active for AllYour <depresso> *** Notice -- K-line active for BaseAre <depresso> *** Notice -- K-line active for Belong2Us * depresso falls over <depresso> those were actual klines that just poped up on my screen
<marcus> hahah. these guys have a dedicated oracle server... an e3500 with 4 cpus and 4gb of RAM <marcus> they've had it for 2 years now <marcus> doing nothing but oracle <marcus> with oracle configure to use no more than 128MB of ram <marcus> and recently they've been complaining about performance <marcus> they thought maybe they needed more memory <marcus> i was like "uhhh. your dataset is smaller than physical ram"
<EarthShaman> note to self: www.manpages.com is NOT an online resource to get *nix man pages
<marcus> can you make a cisco route packets based on their source address? <Jon2> marcus: yes. policy-based routing <FlashMan> marcus - yes, using policy routing <RoadRuner> marcus: yes. policy routing <marcus> anyone else? <drifter-> marcus: yes. policy routing
<dpk> hehe.. looking for domain names. i wrote a program which reads www.news.com and www.zdnet.com and similar crap sites and puts together random consonant/vowel combinations based on it. <dpk> it's pretty lame ;) <Xney> dpk has too much free time <dpk> eeigoua.com avail <dpk> eeigoua.net avail <dpk> eeigouanet.com avail <dpk> get it while its hot
* dpk looks through older messages from af.mil <dpk> From: TinkerARSMail <TinkerARSMail@tinker.af.mil> <dpk> Subject: Help Desk Ticket Open Notice <dpk> Ticket Number TER000000000033, has been "Opened" for problem: OPERATOR <dpk> ERROR..USER IS MORON...///ABC by the Help Desk. <dpk> yeah, i checked the headers.. definitely from af.mil
<FlashMan> we had a guy at pyramid who was stupid enough to plug a mac monitor (DB15) <FlashMan> into an AUI port on the mac <FlashMan> and fizzle pop crack zzzt <FlashMan> dead monitor
<{Mantis}> we had an interesting conversation once while we
were both doing
nitrous balloons...
<{Mantis}> pure...pharamsuetical grade nitrous I might add
<{Mantis}> we were in the middle of this awesome conversation
and then we both
looked up and here walking up to us....was this naked woman
who was painted
from head to toe as a cheetah...
<{Mantis}> with wiskers and all...I thought I was
hallucinating...and then she
walked up to me...and reached out and said...."can I have
some of your
ballooon"
<{Mantis}> I was so startled I let it go......and it went
zinnning around,....
<{Mantis}> she went damn.........now I'll have to blow and
another one...
<PetrDoubt> "Blackout for 00Q1 begins on 04/07, so there should be plenty of time for the options to be credited to your account before then." <PetrDoubt> Date: Fri, 07 Apr 2000 16:29:31 -0700 <PetrDoubt> Thanks, Verio!
<Stemish> "How many NOC staff does it take it screw in a light bulb?" <PetrDoubt> 500 to send the outage notices to nocstaff, 14 managers to escalate it to client services and back, and one to change it.
<PetrDoubt> Wow, that's elite. Customer's DSL is down, so he sends a partial traceroute. The middle of the traceroute. Not the beginning. Not the part where it stops. The middle. <PetrDoubt> "My DSL is down. Here's some hops in alternet." <PetrDoubt> Thanks, dude.
<PetrDoubt> Gee, the people who moved alzheimers.net's DNS away from us forgot to tell us.
<PetrDoubt> OK, kids...what's the maximum number of SOAs per zone? <PetrDoubt> If you said 2, you have a career waiting for you at Verio!
<PetrDoubt> "Our local support is in Dallas, sir." <PetrDoubt> Remember, when you call Dallas, you aren't calling across the country, you're calling next door!
<outcaste> Mr Gates donated $38 million to aids research?> <brian2> yeah, outcaste, he wants windows to be the only deadly disease affecting millions
<EFudd> HAHAHAAHH <EFudd> Subject: Req For Winframe Account <EFudd> Hi Jason, <EFudd> Can U pl... Create this account Immediatly. <EFudd> User Id : crapolla <EFudd> Password :crapolla <EFudd> Other Info <EFudd> 1) User Full Name:Claudia Rapolla
<dem-> how long does it take for best to turn up my FR from 128 to 384? like a day or so? <PetrDoubt> About 5 minutes, I think. Now ask how long PacBell takes.
<@arfbot> did you ever do that project in elementary school <@arfbot> where you decided to give your oral presentation in the form of a rap <@arfbot> so you'd get your best friend to come up with you and go "POOT-POOT-CHIT*** CHIT *** POOT-PPOT-CHIT!!!" <@arfbot> while you rapped <@arfbot> i think i did that once for my project on nintendo
<rone> OH BY THE WAY WE'RE BEING ACQUIRED. AGAIN. <rone> hey, at least we didn't merge with tab.net <PetrDoubt> Yes, we did. <PetrDoubt> Verio owns tabnet. <rone> o fuck
< aurikan> they never actually get together you realize < aurikan> after link saves zelda she becomes an uberbitch and they part ways, zelda fooling around with pages, link frequenting the local brothel
<drGonzo> | /% &.&.&| <drGonzo> | % -- ) .&&&&T| <drGonzo> | -- &&&@D.-- <drGonzo> | ------- -&&&-- * drGonzo problem
<kanzen> heh.. this guy's ont he phone calling his computer pookie.. "Oh come on pookie, you can do it pookie.. there you go pookie, thats it... "
<jimmie> i was gonna spell something with our inaddrs so when you tracerouted our network it said stuff
<PetrDoubt> Geez, I'm going to have to set up a procmail filter to deal with employee farewell notices.
<ktmguy> Ray from Pac Bell: "Yeah, I can't get this line up." <ktmguy> Voice in Background at Pac Bell: "Ray, are you sure we're supposed to be hearing your personal problems?"
<E> and it gets worse. sprint said that ascend techincal support said the problem w/ fast busy's on my PRI was due to my radius server.
<Sysco:#cisco> girlfriend#wr e <Sysco:#cisco> girlfriend#reload <Sysco:#cisco> there, now she's a blonde
<amm> I blew up a $590,000 spectrometer today <amm> xney: yeah, but its covered under insurance <amm> I quenched an NMR 700mhz magnet which caused an explosion in the computer room destroying all the sparcs in there :D
SomeNick: if you tell a girl to never call you again and that she annoys you.... haven't spoke to her in over a month and she's msg'd you a few times on aim but you didn't reply... do you think calling her and telling her it was all a big joke is believable?
<WintrHawk> you know... 100hz is the resonance freq of a chicken head <WintrHawk> a power company found that out the hard way
<toonz> mae-west1#sh access-lists 1 <toonz> mae-west1#oh shit <toonz> ^ <toonz> % Invalid input detected at '^' marker.
<Mystery> singapore is nice <_eight> pussy is so cheap there. <Mystery> there aren't any hookers in singapore <Mystery> you have to cross the border to malaysia for htat <_eight> mystery, you just been hanging out in the wrong singaporean cemeteries.
<Dead_Poets_Society> Phuser has this talent to point out the obvious <Phuser> Dead_Poets_Society is receiving oral sex from a hamster
<CaMR0N> why does everyone call me cumron? <drunkers> probably and honest mistake <CaMR0N> but everyone? <drunkers> did you tell them you were gay? <CaMR0N> yes cause im honest with everyone <drunkers> maybe its not an honest mistake
<superwoman> I had a boyfriend once that made me suck him off while I had a mouthful of beer. <GrandCow> HAHAHAHA that was me bitch! <superwoman> DANNY?!?!?! <GrandCow> MOM?!?!?!?!
<KB8> im sick of you crazypale <crazypale> im sick of you to <KB8> no im sick of you crazypale <crazypale> no ,im sick of you to <KB8> you gte on my damn nerves <crazypale> you make my stomache turn asswipe <KB8> i gotta go ill pm you later <crazypale> ok l8r
<drunkers> do you know who i am? <vinnieT> nope <drunkers> i could rip your eyes out and stick them in your knee and make your knee read a book <vinnieT> i dont read
<rtwh0> why are you upset? <sugadon> who the hell says i was god damn upset? huh? <rtwh0> umm never mind <sugadon> i hate people who spread god damn rumors, muther fucker , god damn
<+GoodScrat> wyatt: how's bounce? <+Wyatt> GoodScrat: decent <+Wyatt> makin a little money off of it <+GoodScrat> how much have you made off of it total to date? <+Wyatt> hmm... maybe 4K <+GoodScrat> over how many years? <+Wyatt> 1 <+GoodScrat> 4k a year, thats not bad profit, when does your company go public?