<Random> Yes. Your testicles, if not stopped, will slaughter the hapless opposition.
<Xaotika> if i ever start a band, remind me to call it MY ASS. <Xaotika> then you could all come watch MY ASS if we ever perform on stage. <Xaotika> MY ASS will rock your world. i'm sure.
<LabMonkey> ok riddle me this <LabMonkey> I open the pack of cigarettes <LabMonkey> pull out one <LabMonkey> pick up my lighter <LabMonkey> put the cigarette back in the pack <LabMonkey> then try to light my nose... <LabMonkey> What the fuck, over.
<StrScream> jeremy: as long as you're going postal, can you find out why I haven't gotten any mail for 3 days?
<StrScream> my pants are back up, after almost no downtime in the last 2 years.
<Starscream> uh <Starscream> i just accidentally told my credit card company i was smoking crack <Starscream> shit.
<octal> i think meeting lots of cute/etc. girls is easier if you're deaf and thus can tolerate raves.
<Random> "You're so sweet, and intelligent. What's your name?" "Jeremy." "Isn't that male?" "Yes." "AAAAH STAB STAB STAB STAB NEVER STOP STABBING I HATE YOU KILL YOU KILL MOMMY KILL KILL." <--- Online lesbians are fun.
<gldnmean> I always thought "The sound of one hand clapping" would be good zen masturbation slang
<nwinter> well, there are solutions to getting rid of nads, eric. <nwinter> i have a fork and a rusty corkscrew. let's do it.
<jorm> fuck freedom. freedom is for weenies. <jorm> COOL people want to be oppressed.
<jorm> if you have to ally yourself with a subculture that likes bad music and shitty drugs, you might as well go with the one where you're more likely to get laid.
<Stuckie> I had to sit through the Sound of Music for TWO FRIGGIN weeks.. bloody school shows... probably why I've cracked... lol <Stuckie> The hiiiiiills are aliiiiiive with the sound of **BANG!!** DIE YOU BASTARDS!!! **BANG!!**
<SimonB> .se servers have been quite stable lately <luna_s> ok so swedish servers are the best ok ok ok <SimonB> I like webgiro <luna_s> demons fine most of the time <luna_s> until a pissed up engineer spills his can on a router <SimonB> :D <SimonB> until? its more of a rule than an exception
<Danelope> This contract doesn't involve sodomy, does it? <harb> actually <harb> damnit
<BigTongue> man, look at this slut on the price is right... bob barker is having a viagra attack
<_orion> I love escelators, they can never break, only temporarially turn into stairs
<yuu_> Am I lagged? <el_wado> hard to tell, maybe you're just slow <yuu_> feh <el_wado> try responding to this: are you gay? <yuu_> are you not funny? <yuu_> how about just pinging me.. that would be simple <el_wado> hmmm your delay could be interpreted as lag or underlying homosexual tendencies -> [yuu_] PING [yuu_ PING reply]: 1sec <el_wado> 1 second - I suggest blatent homosexual
<Art`> Howabout you hold your racquet like your cock? <Saccy> You mean double-handed?
<Saccy> My password is alpha numeric. <Strife> Well mine's a mixture of numbers AND letters.
<Don Ravioli> you hear about [M]? <Xav> you mean about how it's full of rampant homosexuals? <Xav> yeah i heard, bad news man. <Don Ravioli> haha <Don Ravioli> why bad news?
<Aegis> Dude this chick said she wouldn't give me head because she doesn't do that <Vyse> They still make those?
<Keeper> ooooh, another dead mouse <Keeper> I think it was a radioactive mouse too, cos as soon as the mousetrap snapped, the TV reception died for a second <Deke> keeper has mice? <Keeper> not anymore :P
<BLAiR`o_o> does anyone know how i can make it so that my keyboard permenently holds down p?
<MeTh|pizzza> ack! i think some1 is tryin 2 break into my house! i just saw a kladder go by the window... <ddrfreak> really? <MeTh|pizzza> in other chan... <ddrfreak> somoene is trying to break into your house in the other channel?
<deniro> Happy to hear that the french lost the world cup already! <deniro> Next time football will pop up into conversation, those french bastards will pretend an urgent pee to go cry in the toilets instead of being arrogant as usual <bloom> Aren't you french? <deniro> Well... don't tell anyone ok? <deniro> I don't want anybody to think I must have some kind of disease to go so often in the toilets for the next 4 years...
<mdgslve> Zeek the only good thing about sheep is if you get em close enough to a cliff they push back really hard :)
Topic is 'Your mom has sex with sharks.' *** <Drewtig> oh SHIT, that's fucked up =D * Drewtig 's mom read that, and said: "Yeah, but he was more like a weasel that thought he was a shark."
<MadMax> I'm going to buy myself another 6 80GB Seagate Barracuda IV's :D <MadMax> That way, I can set up a 1/2 Terrabyte array <MadMax> Wouldn't that be incredibly cool?! * Altariel looks at MadMax and shakes her head <Altariel> thats a penis thing, isnt it.
<Leb> I'VE BLOODY WELL FORGOTTEN WHAT I HAD INTENDED TO DO <Leb> though i have a sneaking suspicion that it involves an immense iron penis
dsp/#nz2600 boggles at chick logic , "i know you're upset with me, and that upsets me, which is why i'm bitchy at you" -dsp, nz2600
<CrushWork> hes got that "im a barbarin caveman who eats snails and says ooga booga" style look to him <Jed> "I'm a barbarian caveman that eats snails, says ooga booga and lays cable for a living"
<rogers> hahah <guyen> roger: i love you man <guyen> and by "love" i mean that special "stab you in the face and shit down your throat" love <rogers> i love you too man
<gr0undh0g> I spent an hour and a half once trying to tie a hair to a fly <kritical> whyd you do that? <gr0undh0g> so I could have a pet
<Jed_D`Lagged> I don' tknow, I really woulden't want a penis I coulden't hide under my desk. <Jed_D`Lagged> Or one that would take more than one hand to masturbate <Farnarcle> did i miss something
<guyen> so she gets pulled over, and as the bike cop walks up to her, she asks "are you going to at least try to sell me a ticket to the highway patrolmen's ball?" <guyen> then the cop goes "highway patrolmen don't have balls, ma'am" <guyen> and she busts out laughing, he finally gets it and just turns around, gets on his bike, and rides away without another word <guyen> she just sits in her car laughing for like five minutes before she starts her car again <guyen> shit, if i'd try to say something like that he would have gone LAPD on my ass
<Ozzy|> whoa, now i understand why its cheaper to build your own comp <Rufio]LK[> explain your reason * Rufio]LK[ drinks his milk so it can come out his nose :P <Ozzy|> haha <Rufio]LK[> hurry, i wanna hear why :P <Ozzy|> ok, cuz i thought the motherboard costs the most... but i'm lookin at em here and its only around $30
<@haleguu> I cant believe RKelly has more kids out <@haleguu> err vids <spookz[d34dNb3d]> what <spookz[d34dNb3d]> lol <spookz[d34dNb3d]> what vid does he have out now? <@Tama|LongVacation> the one where hes humping little 13 year olds <spookz[d34dNb3d]> is it called "i am a lolicon" ft 14yr olds
<angie> yea, finally finished moving all my stuff in today. <guyen> can't be that bad, she's pretty hot. i could tap dat azz all day <guyen> godamn i need a picture of her so i can at least jerk off to it <angie> isn't she in your class, just stare at her with your photographic memory. <guyen> believe me i do, she's got an azzzzzzz <angie> she's also right behind me. <guyen> are you serious? <angie> yea. she says you're pretty cute too. says you should have the balls to ask her out though. <guyen> um, will you go out with me? <angie> she says yes. pick her up tomm 7:30 after her evening class, she wants to see kate and leopold or whatever. <guyen> are you kidding me? holy shit! im calling your house now <angie> no i'm just fucking with you. <guyen> your're a bitch you know that <angie> i know.