hQDB :: hacker Quote Database

Network Stats: 21112 Approved Quotes | 0 in Moderation Queue
#7247 [ + | - ] 182
<sylwia> I'm drawing black people
<sylwia> for a poster for my english class
<sylwia> I think I made tham too black
<sylwia> you can't really see their faces
#7245 [ + | - ] 397
<Mike_3486> i wonder if i could smother somebody using the CO2
from a Coke can <Sock_Monkee> shrug
<Mike_3486> nobody knows...if i asked how to make a bong from
a wiffle ball, some duct tape, and a rubber band i'd get 10
different answers
#7244 [ + | - ] 434
<Grum_Trivia> shithead1 has won 50 in a row!! Total Points
this WEEK: 22347 & this MONTH: 34899
<Shithead1> I am fucking tired of trivia
<Grumman> imagine that
#7239 [ + | - ] 563
<fo0bar> fuck, how do I contact the IRS?
<egon> cheat on your taxes... they'll contact you.
#7235 [ + | - ] 567
<OneEyedJack> Someone tell me why everyone lists one of their
hobbies as either "hanging out" or "partying"?
<Qtechie> I like to hang out while I party... but chicks are
always grossed out by it, and guys tend to beat me up for it
#7231 [ + | - ] 238
<dietz> Computers, the internet, it's just a large scale
version of Knott's Berry Farm.
<dietz> Oh, and instead of Snoopy, there's porn. Yeah.
#7230 [ + | - ] 319
[ace_kevi] heh, i didn't know there was a programming language
called
brainfuck.
[buz-] goes by "MIPS assembler" also
#7229 [ + | - ] 548
asjk] !list
[asjk] anyone know a good open ftp?
[ck1] 127.0.0.1
[asjk] need a userid/pw
[ck1]anonymous
[bluerose] oh come on give him the good account
[ck1] :)
[bluerose] l: hax0r
[bluerose] p: 31337
[asjk] thx
#7227 [ + | - ] 426
<Prophet_Tenebrae> i am to porn what pot noodle is to snacks.
<Wesley> an insult?
#7226 [ + | - ] 423
<Stray> you're a winner. i'm a winner. we're all winners here.
<KurtBatz> Everyone's a winner baby, that's the truth.  o/~
<Hawx> I have to go to fucking work tomorrow. I'm not a
winner.
<Hawx> I'm just a breadwinner.
<Hawx> But who the fuck wants to work for bread?
<KurtBatz> Ethiopians.
<Hawx> True
#7224 [ + | - ] 1791
***  mrBlond changes topic to "Open party at Minko's, All
welcome. Place for 500"
<Minko> grrrr
<Minko> You can all come, but I'm not gonna be there
*** mrBlond changes topic to "Open party at Minko's  <Minko>
You can all come"
<Minko> Stop it guys, I'm busy this weekend
<Minko> I've got big things planned
*** mrBlond changes topic to "Open party at Minko's  <Minko>
You can all come <Minko> I've got big things planned"
<Minko> Aaargh
#7223 [ + | - ] 216
<wabbit> ok ... we dont choose what cum tastes like ...
otherwise it would taste a WHOLE LOT DIFFERENT!!!
#7221 [ + | - ] 354
*** mrBlond changes topic to "The QuakeFEST is....."
*** fern changes topic to "The QuakeFEST was yesterday !!"
<mrBlond> wow I must be REALLY lagged then
#7220 [ + | - ] 373
*** DarkElf changes topic to "Sundancer Kicked Hiro's butt at
Pool!! :) that's Mr 'I have my own table at home' Gay
Helicopter Pilot Hiro (in case you were wondering)"
<Hiro> *growl*
*** Hiro changes topic to "I lost ONE FUCKING GAME to her ok?"
*** DarkElf changes topic to "yes, but to a WOMAN ?"
<Hiro> she isnt a women
<Hiro> she is a beast from the pits of hell
<Hiro> a demon possessed her
<DarkElf> see - reading that bible thing may have helped
you... and you laughed at the people in #alive
*** DarkElf changes topic to "Hiro converts to christianity"
<Hiro> de: even jesus would have lost that fucking game of
pool
<Hiro> I need a gun, so I can shoot myself
<DarkElf> Hiro: why don't you just stab yoursefl in the eye
with the pool cue.....
<DarkElf> hang on though, going on sunny's description of you
skill you'll probably miss *grin
#7219 [ + | - ] 359
<Sundancer> DE: "The truth is out there" :)
<DarkElf> sunny: yeah, thank god it's out there and not in
here with us
#7216 [ + | - ] 176
<eod> echo "\$cd pub" >t-shirt
<eod> echo "\$more beer" >>t-shirt
<eod> heh
<weis> cat t-shirt | sed s/beer/whiskey/ >better_t-shirt
#7215 [ + | - ] 277
<geekster> mossibly
<geekster> that's most poccibly, but it went thru a horible
translation from brain to fingers
<geekster> ARSE!!
#7214 [ + | - ] 191
<Viper550esp> heh hell, you have no idea what hell is! Try
standing inbetween two large fat women at a manson concert who
decided just to wear the bare minimum to get it in concert.
Oh thats nothing, they decided that it would be fun to start a
mash pit. I kid you not those two women took out 7 people with
one massive shove
#7206 [ + | - ] 250
<Bane> they PROMISED they'd call me
<Xzibit-A> bunch of fucken users
<Bane> that's what i say
<Bane> i'm nothing but two holes and two hands to them
<Bane> *sob*
<Bane> just a cum receptacle
#7201 [ + | - ] 405
<@WatchDragon> dude, i am like -- that close to having my
boating licence
<@motardo> dude, you are like -- that close to having a mullet
#7200 [ + | - ] 554
<zhix> logicbox - sarenna lee rocks you.. she's just so..
bountiful!
<zhix> I could literally get lost in her bosom.
<zhix> I'd accidently drop my bagel in there and end up
falling in..
<barkode> barkode: JOSH, ARE YOU OKAY DOWN THERE? zhix: I'M
FINE. GO AWAY. barkode: I'LL GET HELP. zhix: DON'T YOU DARE
FUCKER. LEAVE ME HERE.
#7199 [ + | - ] 90
<lilp00t> give me somin new to make fun of u for
<death2all82> ummmm i came in today and idled and u went on
for like 45mins. until i responde. then i left for a half an
hour and u were still going on talking to no1
<death2all82> now the fruitcake is PMing me
#7198 [ + | - ] 144
<@Web> <Anastasia> fuck you
<@Web> russian men get upset easily
#7194 [ + | - ] 842
<nit`zZz> I was lovin that pussy while she was lovin this
dick, I was shovin it in her while she was yellin dont quit
<NGN-_-> Then you realized you were dreamin that shit - in
real life your a no-pussy gettin prick
#7192 [ + | - ] 397
<gedamo> Some of our customers used to call their computer
boxes the "brain" and it led tothem calling up saying things
like "My brain isn'tworking"
#7191 [ + | - ] 46
[@Eric^^] win [Eminem - Rap Attack - 16 - Eminem - Forget
About Dre (Live From SNL Feat. Eminem).mp3] - (3m55s/192kbps)
amp
[@nacitar] Rap Attack! OmG
@nacitar gets rapped on by a crow
#7190 [ + | - ] 1286
<eff> the noblest of dogs is the hot dog, it feeds the hand
that bites it.
#7187 [ + | - ] 138
<solo> Think about a time in your life which you had the most
fun, well....then picture work being the total opposite
#7183 [ + | - ] 599
(Jeopardy) hi I need someone to help me with compiling a small
program
(dgc) Jeopardy: What is gcc?
#7179 [ + | - ] 283
<morientes> some fucker just played a trick on me.. i was
sitting in the couch.. well all of a sudden my jocks feel like
their going up my ass crack... i try to pull out the wedge..
most pain i've ever felt... someone put chewy in my jocks and
my ass hairs are all stuck together.. stuck to my jocks.. i
dont fucking believe this shit
#7178 [ + | - ] 826
<BeLLa`> does sperm die when it hits the air, msg me if u know
<carcin0gen-> sounds like someone got a 3 pointer
#7177 [ + | - ] 146
<Tyson> kegs rule
<Tyson> im gonna marry one
<Mousey> ill have an affair with it
#7175 [ + | - ] 233
<Punk-In-Drublic> ill look at my penis... and laugh... or will
i cry??
<Mousey> it deoends if you drew a happy face or a sad face on
it ross
#7174 [ + | - ] 394
<Latino-Heat> my mum wants me to get a piercing or a tattoo to
make me look meaner
#7173 [ + | - ] 366
<Ice|P> blow jobs r better
<mk4> why because you get a load in the mouth
<nim-zero> a load in the mouth is worth two in the hand
#7172 [ + | - ] 157
<Mr_BoGgLeS> she said you looked edible mosey..
<Mousey> well boggles
<Mousey> if she thinks im edible
<Mousey> she probably is fat
<Mousey> i have no fat on me
<Mousey> eating me would be like going on a diet
#7171 [ + | - ] 352
::Sathane.. I am wlasys sober
::Sathane.. excpet when I dirnk
#7167 [ + | - ] 48
<[7^11^Dropout]> i will put you in a wheelchair witha
shpinning, half-twist, lebanese heel kick mate
<Mousey> if you were lebanese you would still be working at
7-11
<Mousey> lying cunt
#7165 [ + | - ] 391
<^FiCtIoN^> get a tounge ring
<CheeseCookies> lol, coz there good on chicks :D
<Mousey> so is an apron
#7163 [ + | - ] 65
<Descartes> A wanker is not a racial slur
<GORE> it is
<GORE> beleive me it is
<GORE> to me
#7162 [ + | - ] 152
<@Latino-Heat> when i was in school, during free periods i'd
sit in the library cos i couldnt go home and i'd look up stds
in encyclopedias
<@Latino-Heat> cos i had rashes everywhere
#7161 [ + | - ] 310
<KINGofEXTREME> i forgot cars come in manual man
<KINGofEXTREME> my friend starts changing gears
<KINGofEXTREME> im like what are you doing
<KINGofEXTREME> didnt know what was going on
#7160 [ + | - ] 375
<dEaD_fAiRy> plus the guy has to look a certian way to turn me
on
<Mousey> does he have to look desperate
#7159 [ + | - ] 55
<b|aze> i wanked my dog once
<b|aze> haha
<b|aze> i was so pissed
#7158 [ + | - ] 167
<Chambered> my hair is halfway down my back
<tize> thats too long
<Chambered> but when your taking a shit and run out of paper,
its alright
#7157 [ + | - ] 381
<DeF`> hehe... The Man in the Iron Mask made me cry... for
real
<cuzzzin> debbie does dallas made me jack off
#7156 [ + | - ] 338
<vas> my dad recons i dont look up porn
<vas> cuase i tell him it would come up on the bill if i do so
#7155 [ + | - ] 133
<KINGofEXTREME> alligators are male crocdiles
#7153 [ + | - ] 1135
<bumr> maybe he makes mad love to the penguin
<dys> Perhaps Cathy wears a Tux the Penguin suit for him.
<dys> And then he "debugs her code" all night long.
<bumr> cunnilinux
#7152 [ + | - ] 302
<Fryboy> stormos sister aint that bad
<stormo> please don't talk about my sister like that
<ambrness> go back to insulting me and my taste, Fryboy ..
safer ground
<stormo> she has more integrity than to go out with some loser
who spends all his life on IRC
<Fryboy> ahahahah
-ambrness- thats why incest is out of the question for him