<clay> prostitution is illegal in the united states of america <ryano> not in nevada <clay> were you conceived in nevada
<lewZer> Man, translating 2 pages of non-spaced, non-punctuated, instructions for making lsd is awful rough on a 9th grade dropout
<chris--> now i have to tell the coach that i can't play because my wrist hurts <chris--> and he asks me how i injuried it <chris--> and i say swinging a bat <chris--> and it sounds stupid. <chris--> it has 'masturbation injury' written all over it
<l0wkey> i am in a jam...it is my old roommates 21st birthday tonight, no school tomorrow, a few movies i want to see, Simpsons and X-Files...what to do? <l0wkey> I KNOW...STAY ON IRC
<reuben> send me a picture of you.
<{Elmo}> no scanner
<reuben> get one.
<{Elmo}> no $$
<ryano> in other words reub, you probably dont want to see her
<l0wkey> usually if someone pisses me off i punch their girlfriend in the mouth and scram
<cade> zzz, you wanna kill yourself or something? <zZz-> cade, I've attempted so many times and failed, it's not even funny.. <zZz-> Accually, it is kinda funny.
<pimp> im going to go play with my toys now <RiP> that means hes going to play with himself right <pimp> no, im going to go play with my X-Men action figures
<gee-> i stole a 5 dollar pen from officemax and it didnt work <homieC> your dad stole a 5 dollar condom from a 7-11 and it didnt work
<reuben> my dad claims that he got his first piece of ass from a cow. <reuben> i had a great upbringing
<l0wkey> im getting hemorrhoids <l0wkey> from sitting on my butt all day ircing <l0wkey> i should sue Khaled
<reuben> i'm going to name my kid with elite capitalization <langdon> my kid will be all caps.
<fagx> in order to maintain our status as high-ranking officials in #lost we have a maximum of 1 offline friend each
<Merlin3> It was my grandmother's dying wish that I receive some dave matthews bootlegs... if you have any mp3ed (not from the 4 CDs) please msg me or just go and DCC it to me... thank you for your concern. with everyone's help, I think I will be able to make it through these difficult times.
<cheerio> i like computers better than chicks cuz they will willingly accept my 3.5" floppy
<Puff-working> I play the banjo..never learned fiddle..but I might someday. <Puff-working> and I can make a harmonica sing. <Unfor|Work> I play the CD player
<ryo-ohki> and it would be an understatement to say I AM FUCKING BAKED OUT OF MY MIND <DCBastard> lol - what else is new? <DCBastard> one day you should come into the channel and go "WOW - I AM TOTALLY FUCKING STRAIGHT" - we'd all be like "holy shit! that is amazing!"
<thinkmad> who made these stupid ass tutorials? <thinkmad> one of them should be <thinkmad> how to be fucking stupid
<ohm> damn <ohm> FUCK <ohm> DAMN <ohm> i was just in an AIM convo with a chick, and my grandmother's window pops up <ohm> FUCK <ohm> i go like this to her <ohm> "i want to suck on your clit" <ohm> FUCK
<Gersh> wow <Gersh> I rule <Gersh> I made one of my ex's cry over aim <Gersh> dammit I wish she had a webcam
<GiRLiE-> ur cruel.. but funny <bytraper> and you have a beuatiful mind... but you're fat
<Cyrix_> everytime you take a crap, you design the unique cracks and lines in your terds, and sometimes decorate them with peanuts or corn <Cyrix_> and occasionally, you tint the shade. thats all designing
* DuneBoy wonders why his code won't compile <DuneBoy> missing ) my ass <ZorbaTHut> "Ironically, however, his ass was indeed missing its right cheek."
<Soronel> Just so everyone knows, if a life suddenly appears, I have dibs <Soronel> I'm not likely to get one otherwise
<Twingy> almost as annoying as you dal, except your hear longer <DAL9000> that would be almost insulting if it were grammatically correct
<KeeperS> one of the questions on there is "HOW MANY SIDES DOES A TRIANGLE HAVE?" <KeeperS> and it has a picture of a triangle <KeeperS> and then 4 answer choices <KeeperS> how do you get that wrong?
<JeyK> 7) I wanted to see if my penis would fit through the CD. It did, but the firemen and rescue squad had to break the CD to free me.
<mov> DAL: u seen 2001 - A space odyssey? <DAL9000> that has to be the stupidest question i've ever heard
*** Toramo has joined #--------- <Toramo> It's a full house tonight!!! <Illuvatar> Can I be uncle Joey?
*** Topic is 'Current IQ is, make no mistake, 0120 (your IQ is subtantially higher, if you know what that is in decimal)' <DuneBoy> fr0zen: it looked like base 3 to me, which would mean it was 25 isn;t it??? 0(3^3) + 1(3^3) + 2(2^3) + 1?
<vvortex3> hey, the isp i work for, cwnet has a legal copy of microsoft visual studio, but we cant find the cd, can someone please email me deruntime.dll so i can fix a bug in one of our machines? <Cyrix> what. <jim4> vv: no <Cyrix> get a new cd <Cyrix> or go to #mypersonalfileserver *** vvortex3 (vvortex3@arena.cwnet.com) has left #C++ <snibril> we don't support warez, and neither incomptent isps *** vvortex3 (vvortex3@arena.cwnet.com) has joined #c++ <vvortex3> jerk <Cyrix> vvortex3 on @#mypersonalfileserver
<kanin> if (User->HasAppropriateBook()) { while (User->
LacksClue()) { User->ReadAppropriateBook(); } }
else { while(User->HasNotGottenAppripriateBook()) {User->
StumbleAroundHalfAssedInTheDark(); User->WhineOnIRC(); } }
<Dabljuh> hey <Dabljuh> People keep mentioning I would be akilled <Dabljuh> which is simply not true *** Quits: Dabljuh (~dabljuh@195.141.143.ZiRC-52133) (User has been banned from ZiRC (Repeated ban evasion))
<ishmal> wandered into a lesbian bar once, was there about an hour before i noticed <ishmal> lots of girls, no guys <ishmal> thought i was just lucky
<mov> scali and DAL here, cool must say <DAL9000> mov: nice set of lips to reach my ass all the way from sweden
*** Now talking in #bible <Synial> Have you ever wondered what JESUS looks like without his skimpy loincloth? WITH advanced technology, we have made a realistic image of the full Jesus! Is he hung like his dad? FIND OUT NOW! FREE XXX PICTURES!!!
<Amanda> Oh yeah, a thug did his commemorative speech on "P Diddy" today <kisama_> fuck thugs <kisama_> thugs will amount to shit later <kisama_> there's a bunch of thugs here taking CISCO NETWORKING CERTIFICATION courses <kisama_> they are all "YEAH MAN I'M GONNA MAKE 80K COMING RIGHT OUT OF HIGH SCHOOL MAN!"
<lewpoo> whats the most advanced topic in java? <joeblowgt> lewpoo: not getting kickbanned in #java
<BadM0f0> Hello, this is a Polish virus. Since we do not have the technology to create a real virus, please delete all files on your home directory.
<DrWoody> We're talking about C++ here right? <detmod> no java, duh <DrWoody> Oh, I though Univ. of IL was too l337 for java <detmod> what the hell is l337? <DrWoody> OMG YOU CANNOT POSSIBLY BE A COMP SCI MAJOR! YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT L337 IS!!! =O
<The_Roach> Well, the boss' wife needs me to fix her computer. <The_Roach> You know what that means. <Anton> you're gonna be fixing a computer for a bit? <Waldo> pr0n music stuck in your head? <The_Roach> Yes and yes.