hQDB :: hacker Quote Database

* aiel wonders why the load on his O2 has passed 3.0
<core> aiel: netscape ?
<xL> aiel: I told you VRML pr0n was a bad idea :)

<******> "oh yeah, i got me a 643gb ultradrive, with 23
supermegs of zingram, and i have a 160000 channel cable
installed by telstra, a proto router which goes into each of
my 16 terminals around my house, and i am having sex while
typing this all, and taking copious amounts of drugs aswell."

<doctorb> i want a  microwavable dildo. i'm sick of the cold
plastic.

<Longi> i'm going to go moisturize my testicles.
Longi is gone (02:23AM): vitamin wank

<doctor`> "hallo! i am reeecki marten! sex masheen! i love all
the preeety gerls! lets us have secks! constantleee! i am
south american sensation! bulging spaniard genitals!"

<hobbes`> I cracked the shits at ppl knocking on my door last
night and answered it naked - teach them to ever ask me for
money again stupd door spammers

<ckx> xmas was fun back before i was blessed with pubes and
still had hopes and dreams and such

<snag> i once jerked off in my face, just to see what it was
like

<im3t8> my last nightmare was of my computer trying to kill me
<Apathetic> really?
<im3t8> but in the end it was just the mouse
<Apathetic> maybe that's metaphoric for something
<Apathetic> :/
<im3t8> its a microsoft mouse
<im3t8> :/

<Camo> i licked the adhesive on the envelope cuz i thought it
would be erotic

[xite] i hate movies with abrupt endings
[xmas_hate] ya i hate when i only download clips of porn too

<neutrl> i don't have any tables
<mAimZ> da wheels 'o steel...
<mAimZ> you should get some... And get all your favorite tunes
on LP... It's more fun than 4 hookers and a jimmy hat!
<hypr> i highly doubt that

* CanuckSaq screws with people's minds way too much
<mindrape> CanuckSaq: you must have a little weewee, cuz i
didn't feel you were screwing mine :/
<CanuckSaq> mr: a) I have a gigantic cock, and b) you assume
you actually possess a mind

<JDigital> Say, how long would 600Mb take to download on a
1.5Mb connection? Lets assume I were to download an entire CD
from Pyoko.org.
<Zaratustra> DO I LOOK LIKE GETRIGHT TO YOU MOTHERFUCKER

<CodeMason> You lack belief in all the thousands/hundreds of
thousands of supreme beings that have been believed in at one
point or another. So to them you are an atheist.
<Kyonshi> CM is sooo smart ^_^
<CodeMason> Kyo: It feels good to know my statements warrant
an anime smilie face.

<MiddleSF2> wow 80 people eh? I thought irc would be closed on
x-mas eve ^_^

<Furan> the only 2 types of women that don't bitch and moan
are gifs and jpgs

(zoo0oop) has anyone ever been known to get frostbite from
being in a data center for many hours without a hot drink?

(ashke) id like to take someone from the 1950s
(ashke) like some 15 year old kid
(ashke) and show him the internet
(ashke) "GOLLY GEE LOOK AT THAT DONKEY HAVE SEX WITH THAT
LADY"

(driz) sometimes i bring my mom on irc
(crystalize) whats her nick?
(driz) i usually give her the nick Coupon_Master
(driz) because we're jewish, etc.

(adm) No definitions found for "verio", perhaps you mean:
(adm) SUX

(kap) damn im gassy tonight
(kap) too bad eSmell went out of buisness
(kap) i could punish you guys forever

(wd) there's like a whole dentist syndrome thing called
"mountain dew mouth"
(wd) in which your teeth are just fugly

<necrofile> i wonder what happens if u put your playlist in
your playlist
<DigDug> OMG DON'T!!!!
<DigDug> THE UNIVERSE WILL COLLAPSE :D

(drmatitis) ya, i've graduated from the rockstar mullet to the
NASCAR mullet

<nird> no i would never associate myself with ravers. i listen
to intellegent music like nirvana, rush, and tori amos

<PolestaR> nah you can survive short periods
<PolestaR> in space
<PolestaR> but its cold isnt it aswell
<PolestaR> I donno for sure

*** [ircnic]
(ircnic@couldnt.find.condoms.so.I.used.my.leftsock.com) has
left #trance

*** CSGpunk
(CSGpunk@dialup-67.25.73.97.Dial1.Raleigh1.Level3.net) has
joined #winprog
<CSGpunk> anyone live in raleigh, nc and know where i can get
drugs

~ frOsty- giggles.. in a manly, tesrosterone-filled sort of
way.

<eldee> uNF = universal noise of fucking
<BombScare> usually the only thing i hear when im fucking is
"who the fuck are you"

(robb): my father passed away suddenly on thursday, and insted
of spending time with him durring his final days i was too
busy flooding your gay ass channel cuz you faggots decided to
ban me.

<DTOX> I just spent 20 min arguing with the manager at
McDonalds that I gave him a $20 instead of the $10 they
thought I gave them.  Finally he gives me a $10 back + change
and I go home and find out it really was a $10 I gave them and
I'm an asshole.
<DTOX> I drove back and apologized and gave them back the $10
they gave me
<CoMBo> stick it to the man
<DTOX> combo:  I have a fucking job, I don't need to lie at
McDonalds to make money you lazy fucking raft nigger

(CitizenC) You know what I don't understand? Why my bank
requires me to have a hardcore, uber-encrypted password so I
can see how much I have left to pay on my MasterCard. Fuck...
if somebody else wants to access my account and pay it off, be
my guest.

<Confuzion> ok all females: 1) Get in fron of webcam 2) take
off shirt 3) focus on boobies 4) *click* 5) /dccsend confuzion
boobie.jpg 6) repeat process for bottom portion of body.
*note* do not mix up steps please follow corect order. thank
you.

<asm> SHUT THE FUCK UP!!!!!!!!!!!!!
<mmx> STOP FUCKING SHUT THE FUCK UPING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

<+Cypherus> what is a splash-screen?
<Nagaika> when your screen falls into the bathtub

<inverse> dick is like the most popular first name for
congressmen

<d1giPhux>  ME AND TYL0R WILL HIJACK ALL THEIR CAMELS
<sm0ke>  and crash them into tents

<_Bas_> I want to be a database admin and part time mechanic
when I graduate

<shervin> i have installed a Semen Control and Flood Restictor
Waste System (SCFRWS) to control my ejaculations which land on
the keyboard.. and drain it to the local public swimming pool

<asr> 'fo sheezy.
<Sabboth> what the fuck does that mean in english? you should
understand that having a day job precludes me from 'keeping it
real' and as such, I lack a certain familiarity with the
language of the 'streets' as it were.

<spicrx7> if the sidewalks were paved with coks, i'd walk on
my asshole

<spazzer> ahh fuck
<spazzer> i did it again
<spazzer> spilled tap ramen juice in my lap twice
<Cured> see and I thought you were just singing along to
Britney Spears

*** QvtQht is now known as TomHanks
*** AMANDA is now known as MegRyan
<TomHanks> {S gotmail

<Plot> I was either going to die now
<Plot> or get 80% third degree burns atleast
<Plot> someone had the gas nob opened
<Plot> I went into kitchen
<Plot> switched a bulb
<Plot> and wham
<Plot> kitchen was filled with one big ass fire ball
<theForger> woah dude
<C--> damn
<Jyrsija> jesus
<ThaDragon> If you just blow up your kitchen, and then proceed
to get on IRC and tell people about it, you might be a junkie.

<fate-> right, people here aren't running a charity
<fate-> it's one big mental maturbation session

<wild-> i like to play this game where i see how far i can
stick my arm up someone's ass before their heart stops beating

<kyourek> KEEEEEEEEEEEEEIIIIIIIIAAAAAAAAAAAAAEEEEEEEEEE!!
<DrWoody> ... What?
<kyourek> Just practicing my karate.

<BlackDeth> warez b dum
<BlackDeth> go traffic cocaine
<BlackDeth> if you want to traffic illegal goods
<BlackDeth> do smth useful