hQDB :: hacker Quote Database

Network Stats: 21142 Approved Quotes | 1 in Moderation Queue
#2188 [ + | - ] 227
<AlmtyBob> god my ball-sweat smells good
<AlmtyBob> too bad I have a cold 8(
<AlmtyBob> can hardly smell it
<skmt> yeah.
<skmt> ball sweat has a weird smell.
<SD-Washu> mine fucking stinks
<AlmtyBob> it's like coffee though
<AlmtyBob> doesn't taste as good as it smells
<mdl> AlmtyBob: dude
<mdl> you taste your nutsaq sweat?
<skmt> you only need to sniff your hand after you beat it,
fool.
<AlmtyBob> lets just say it's a good thing my cum smells bad
#2183 [ + | - ] 451
<kisama> you guys are lightweight nosepickers
<kisama> i get bloody mucus sometimes
<kisama> have to break out the guaifenesin
<kisama> or insufflate salt water
<McMoo> man
<McMoo> don't even talk shit about my nose
<McMoo> i can get quarters up it horizontally
<McMoo> my record is 8 pennies in one nostril
<kisama> circus freak
#2180 [ + | - ] 515
(`KGB) I'm going to #jamaica I've always wanted to visit
#2179 [ + | - ] 398
<Son-Doobi> i've been thinking man
<Son-Doobi> today is 10 11 01
<Son-Doobi> thats binary shit
<Son-Doobi> we living in the binary age
#2178 [ + | - ] 98
<KidHype> <Razoola> Honey, they are picking on me again on the
rg boards
<KidHype> <Razoolas wife> Well i never...i will tell them how
awesome you are and that will show them
<KidHype> <Razoola> thanks hun, you rock *sniff*
#2177 [ + | - ] 119
<SAV2880> Ok, my point ... who the hell cares about the ZD
bank account (as long as it's not -$5 million or something!)
<SwampGas> SAV2880: the 10 people who support emuchrist
<SwampGas> and it's my duty as owner of ztnet, owner of
retrogames, owner of cps2 decryption tables to alert them
#2176 [ + | - ] 308
<Goemon> There is no good mp3 trading programs now.
<maff> sure there are
<maff> ftp.
<Goemon> I tried that.\
<Goemon> In order to get name/password I had to sign up for
porn.
#2175 [ + | - ] 514
<boozie> during my nap i farted underneath the blanket and i
almost killld myself
#2172 [ + | - ] 1291
<refugee> man
<refugee> you cant cancel an AOL subscription online
<dwai> try to do it over the phone
<refugee> and they want your screenname when you cancel
<refugee> so I gotta be like "yeah, my screenname is
SIZZLINGCROTCH"
#2171 [ + | - ] 855
(Reverend_) i thought i had to shit really bad
(Reverend_) but then i just farted like 3 times, and now i'm
all cool
(Reverend_) but my ass is kinda wet and sticky
(Reverend_) any hot chicks, msg me, and we'll talk about it
(Reverend_) share your feelings
#2168 [ + | - ] 120
<Miko> hey i don't remember them dropping food on NYC when
they crashed into the WTC
#2167 [ + | - ] 467
*** Topic in #cars is 'saab's look like confused suitcases
with wheels'
#2166 [ + | - ] 619
<grey> wow
<grey> i didn't realise afghanistan had enough infrastructure
for two nights' worth of air attacks
#2164 [ + | - ] 334
::: .signoff@1.32p> m|ch (michelle@XX-XX-XX-XXX.ivideon.com);
to get over someone old, get under someone new
#2162 [ + | - ] 316
<saint_> and i'm not nasty. i'm actually not that big of a
pedophile
#2161 [ + | - ] 515
<|Chris> anyone else got beer?
<|Chris> wanna play a drinking game with me?
<|Chris> everytime a line contains a word, you have to drink.
#2160 [ + | - ] 359
<TheMyst> hey, anyone here use a radar detector?
<Customz> yes why myst?
<Customz> i only use it so i know when to stash the blunt
<Customz> fuck speeding
#2159 [ + | - ] 423
<blazemore> in afghanistan, people are worried about dying
tonight. in the us, i'm worried about completing my mame
collection before this site rom site dies.
#2157 [ + | - ] 420
[16:18] <novocain> shit its 4:20
[16:19] *** THC_420 (VR66@24.102.63.76) has joined #winprog
#2151 [ + | - ] 554
<Kashan> I've stuck plenty of stuff up my ass and it's never
been anything but apinful
<Gayo> Kashan, there's a big difference between good anal sex
and sticking things up your ass.
#2150 [ + | - ] 368
* Derek_ thinks costa ricans are wierd
<matts> I think people who spell weird "wierd" are weird
#2149 [ + | - ] 326
<novocain> so i have a "lesbian hot tub party to go to next
weekend
<JFalcon> novocain, good for you, did you make sure they have
running water?
<novocain> its my wife's lesbian friends
#2148 [ + | - ] 585
<Kazz> I will only baby talk to my kid.
<Kazz> Even when he's 40.
<JDigital> hee
<Kazz> "How's my cutest little sweet baby pie pumpkinheeeead?"
<Kazz> "Fuck off, dad."
<Lee-Ham> Issum wiggle umpkins?
* Silkenray laughs
<Kashan> I'm going to teach my kid the wrong words
#2147 [ + | - ] 624
<Xerox> My first kid won't have a name, he'll have to pick his
own at the name selection menu.
#2142 [ + | - ] 939
<mEsHmAn> how do i set myself as away?
<mEsHmAn> in mIRC
*** theForger sets mode: +b *!
*@host62-7-101-176.btinternet.com
*** mEsHmAn was kicked by theForger (mEsHmAn is away)
#2141 [ + | - ] 268
<jD> Best thing about a 12 year old girl, though...
<jD> ...when you flip her over, she looks just like a 12 year
old boy
<jD> ...
*** Geothermal has quit IRC (Ping timeout)
<jD> I guess he's away off to get a 12 year old girl.
* Fishbird flips jD over.
<jD> Yes, except that I'm more 18 than 12.
<jD> I'd look like a girl with a really hairy arse.
#2140 [ + | - ] 491
<torque--> i can fart out loud in an internet cafe because
everyones wearing headphones
#2133 [ + | - ] 428
<Kashan> I think we should circumsize horses so they look
prettier in the porn videos
#2132 [ + | - ] 1219
<DigiGnome> doesn't play properly. The White Stripes one.
<Thom> Ach. Dang.
<DigiGnome> Unless it's MEANT to sound like a cat trying to
shit wasps through a sewn up asshole.
<puchiko> It is.
<DigiGnome> Ah. A Slipknot cover, then.
#2129 [ + | - ] 381
<CoMBo> haha dude is oktane fucking ?
<refugee> CoMBo: no, he's just trying to fix that girl's back
#2128 [ + | - ] 562
<stretch> !seen tits
* Trivial_ has never seen tits. Sorry!
#2125 [ + | - ] 430
<matts> memcpy(matts,einstein);
<KrZDG> compilation error cannot convert smart d00d to dumb
ass.
#2123 [ + | - ] 452
<CoderMan> kritical, you are dumber than a dead rock
<matts> dead rock
<matts> umm
<matts> CoderMan news flash
<matts> rocks can't live
<matts> :
#2121 [ + | - ] 618
*** atnnn (atnnn@hv-hs-37-38.aei.ca) has joined #winprog
<atnnn> hi
<atnnn> what is the code for "+" on WM_KEYDOWN
<Wy4tt> VK_RTM
<atnnn> and minus?
<Wy4tt> VK_RTFM
<atnnn> i can't find it
#2119 [ + | - ] 312
<krayons> 95% of the girls at rutgers university in new jersey
<krayons> have stds
<killspree> haha
<killspree> no way
<kara> bullshit man
<killspree> no wonder their basketball and football teams suck
so bad
<krayons> its not bullshit
<VeRrUcKt> lol
<killspree> the players are running around in pain
#2118 [ + | - ] 319
<spazzer> paul is sad because he had a bout of premature
ejaculation
<tobdude> everytime I think of premature ejaculation... I
think like a gun going off without anybody firing it... like
you are walking along... and BAM!@
<tobdude> oh crap! I just ejactulated myself
#2117 [ + | - ] 80
<Tim_K> when you say 6" do you mean 6.00" or the 5.70" rods?
<spazzer> tim
<spazzer> we mean
<spazzer> rods that are 6 inches long
<spazzer> not 6" rods that are 5.7" long
<spazzer> but 6" rods that are 6" long
<Tim_K> spazzer heh.. well.. 6 = 5.7 rounded ;)
#2116 [ + | - ] 77
<opivy-z28> DAMNIT I just puked in my mouth
#2115 [ + | - ] 331
<opivy-z28> I'm being totally serious... do any of you ever
see like a 9-12 yr old girl and think she has nice legs
<opivy-z28> i do...and i wonder if thats normal
#2114 [ + | - ] 133
<opivy-z28> black chix vaginas look like a 10 year old leather
wallet
#2113 [ + | - ] 272
<Tristan> Anyone thinks I should trade my '00 VW Cabrio for
'01 Honda Prelude?
<tigeraid> at least the Prelude has about 90% less homosexual
factor
<Rydawg> tristan, do you like guys?
<Rydawg> how do you shift gears when your wrist is so freakin
limp?
#2112 [ + | - ] 40
<moomba> i heard that a company called nissan was coming with
a Z type thing
<moomba> but that's not out yet
<moomba> it's supposedly really fast but only has 2 seats
#2110 [ + | - ] 609
<RaMTuFF> i like my women like i like my coffee
<RaMTuFF> quiet !
#2109 [ + | - ] 393
<aNuBiS-> i like my women like i like my roads... flat and
well traveled
#2107 [ + | - ] 499
<SPD-DMN> yo theres a fucking swat team on the road accross
from me
<SPD-DMN> im going to check it out
<RockShox> SPD-DMN will be back in 10 to 20
#2106 [ + | - ] 388
<RockShox> girls love attention and irc is some place where
everyone pays attention to them
#2105 [ + | - ] 305
<RockShox> greddy is pretty high quality stuff
<RockShox> i prefer apexi exhausts tho
<ocx> for cars?
<RockShox> no for bicycles
#2104 [ + | - ] 700
<Tim_K> last time I jumped into a convertible.. I nearly got
but-fucked by the gear shifter..
#2102 [ + | - ] 727
<LegendZ28> I remember when I was a kid and I was at my
friends house, my friends big brother ran into the room with a
huge turd in his hand and was like "LOOK HOW HUGE THIS IS!"
#2099 [ + | - ] 917
<ScratGod> I put a comment by each line of code that says
<ScratGod> x = 1;  // FUCK YOU FIGURE IT OUT YOURSELF BITCH