<r0y_g3rb1l> police stations are clubs for thick-skulled short dicked racist gun-nuts that took every civil-ass test they could because no one else hires people that put "former nigger beater" on their resume.
<konfuzed> i'm at this lan party... <konfuzed> most of the others are downstairs, drinking. <konfuzed> now they've all got goatse as their background image.
<SKS> Hey, type lana backwards. <LadyGrace> SKS, anal? <SKS> Yes, please. <WhoaOutOfControl> Hey SKS, type cips backwards. <SKS> spic * SKS was kicked by Anubis- (Racist language detected (4 hour ban) -- (207 served)) <WhoaOutOfControl> Teehee <rancid_alan> What an ass.
< [Syntax]> woah, I just cracked open my fortune cookie and it was dead on.. < Feenyx> how so? < jonnyv> "you will eat a cookie"?
<seekm> this was a call someone had that i was helping them with <seekm> "is you caps lock key on?" <seekm> "i think so, the keyboard is in all capital letters"
<whitay> i just wanna kill mysql <whitay> myself* <heaika> that's an odd warning.. <whitay> mmm stupid reflex typing
<JonnyCash> man i was having this bad dream about driving piss drunk but then i woke up from it <JonnyCash> well i had to because the light turned green
<WooWoo> i was walking through goodwill with my daughter to look for costume ideas and there was this stuffed trout adn i gave it to her, adn literally, she smacked me with it and laughed <WooWoo> and i'm like. <WooWoo> omfg <WooWoo> she just trout slapped me <WooWoo> wtf <WooWoo> she's not on irc <WooWoo> it was all big too <WooWoo> like 3 feet long
gentoogod: omg dude gentoogod: today i might the stupidest 3 people i ever met gentoogod: thier 3 brains combined couldnt solve the dilemma they faced today siral21: what was it gentoogod: ok before i say this gentoogod: 100% true, not one second of a lie gentoogod: this lady went into mcdonalds today and ordered a big mac for her gentoogod: and ordered 2 mcgrittles one for each kid. one had bacon one without gentoogod: her sons are around 18 or 19 so not infants gentoogod: she went to the counter furious cause the son that wanted bacon has no bacon on his and the one that didnt want bacon has bacon on his gentoogod: i fell on the floor beside her and couldnt stop laughing gentoogod: so i finally stood up and asked her to repeat, thinking maybe shes drunk gentoogod: i swear to god she looked at me straight faced and repeated it. and her 2 sons were beside her mad that they didnt get the order they wanted
<Siege>: Omg theres this really hot girl at my school. <WarHawk>: Aww. Siegebear is in wuv. <Siege>:Everytime she smiles i wanna cum all over her face. <WarHawk>: Whoa
<tadpoleofdeath> Why do so many math majors confuse Halloween and Christmas? <elfking> why? <tadpoleofdeath> Because Oct 31 is Dec 25
<SnowBlind> We need to get that professor who mutated Oranges to have THC, so that Bacon has THC. <^goat^> mmmmm potbacon <SnowBlind> GET HIGH WHILE YOU FRY! <LynchHung> lol <SnowBlind> We'll call it JAMAICAN BACON! <Gazoo> Oranges have THC?
<@dawoker> my manager dropped by and told me to stop using things like "my president is an assclown" in string testing for some of our code.
<Managore> Heh.. All I ever drink is cock and fanta. <Managore> FUCK <Apocalypse> !!!ROFLMAO!!! ..Freudian slip eh?? <Managore> NO <Managore> FUCK <Managore> SHIT <Managore> FUCK <Managore> FUCK
<@Casper> Girl from work and I went to the pool hall <@Casper> I asked her if she wanted to start talking <@Casper> She said we would talk about it tomorrow <@Casper> She has a nice looking sister too <@cypher> start talking about what? <@Casper> going out <@cypher> people _plan_ relationship status? <Vehementi> not only do they plan relationship status, they plan *talking* about relationship status. <Vehementi> later in the relationship this is more commonly known as the "Let's talk about our relationship" trap <@cypher> Vehementi: <3 <sh> $relationship->discuss(); <sh> new Relationship;
<Cyb> heh this guy I knew in high school forgot to write an english paper until like the day before it was due and it was supposed to be a work of fiction a couple pages long <Cyb> so he wrote down the half-life sp story <Cyb> and stretched it out as much as he could <Cyb> and got an A
<ColdRage687> do you like psychiatry <Avs4Cup2K3> my mom's a psychiatrist <ColdRage687> i dont <ColdRage687> i used to think the brain was the most fascinating part of the body <ColdRage687> but then i realized <ColdRage687> pssssh <ColdRage687> look whats telling me that
<sic1> so you tried to go home <sic1> and it wouldn't start? <sp4nk> Indeed. <sp4nk> I wish I knew a thing or two about cars. <sp4nk> I wonder if there's a troubleshooter online that's like Microsoft's thing. <sp4nk> Problem: My car will not start. <sic1> HAHAHA <sp4nk> Suggestion: Have you tried turning the key? <sp4nk> [ ] Yes, this solved the problem. <sp4nk> [x] No, the car still will not start. <sp4nk> This troubleshooter is unable to solve your problem.
<lh> oh shit <lh> started pickin my nose <lh> then realised i got like my webcam on to 7 ppl
<Bilbo>: Pac Man time! <Bilbo>: < ............. M <Bilbo>: < ........ M <Bilbo>: < . M <Bilbo>: ^ <Bilbo>: Oops. I died.
<cbatoday> my friend walked in on me having sex on his bed last night <Nemoso> was he pissed? <cbatoday> well yea, it was with his girlfriend :
cpufreak04: Fun fact. cpufreak04: Take 'HAL' from 2001: A Space Odyssey cpufreak04: And move every letter one letter forward (Y=Z, X= Y) cpufreak04: What do you get? MavAntagonist: g_k cpufreak04: FORWARD. MavAntagonist: oh....IBM! MavAntagonist: OMG!
<worstazn> yo i need to find a new bitch.. <mejmanyme> k i have a plan <mejmanyme> you running windows or linux? <worstazn> winxp.... <mejmanyme> k, hit start and then "run" <mejmanyme> type in "cmd" <mejmanyme> after commandprompt opens <mejmanyme> type currentbitch /release <mejmanyme> then currentbitch /renew <mejmanyme> now type currentbitch /all and send the results
Rain Complex: That was depressing Drew Rain Complex: Please hold while I stab myself to death BLUeTalon24: ok BLUeTalon24: hurry back Rain Complex: Okay, I'm back BLUeTalon24: wb! Rain Complex: I went to Hell ): BLUeTalon24: that musta sucked Rain Complex: Thank you Rain Complex: Yes Rain Complex: Well I'm still there Rain Complex: They have computers! BLUeTalon24: they have AIM too? Rain Complex: They're 133s running only WinNT and AOL BLUeTalon24: with spyware galore Rain Complex: And pop-up makers Rain Complex: Bootlegged Britney Spears WMAs playing in fast forward 24/7 BLUeTalon24: haha WMA is evil Rain Complex: Linux users are crying everywhere Rain Complex: And all the Mac people jumped into the pit of fire and sulfur Rain Complex: The keyboards are DVORAK BLUeTalon24: hahaha Rain Complex: They only have trackballs Rain Complex: And tape-drives Rain Complex: 4.25 floppy drives that don't work BLUeTalon24: left handed single click dirty rolling ball mice with no scroll wheel. Rain Complex: No scroll wheels for thousands of miles, my friend
<Cheese> I'm going to Visit Canada one day anyway :/ <microburn> Cheese, we'll go drinking. <Cheese> microburn, not until I'm like 23/24 ;s <Cheese> What would be funny is <Cheese> if we all still talk <microburn> Cheese, : That would be sad if stayed on IRC for 8 more years talking to you all. <Cheese> :s * microburn commits suicide. <Cheese> 8? <microburn> I have 8. <microburn> I'm 16. <Cheese> microburn, I can't see a day when we still don't come on IRC <Cheese> we might have graphics then <microburn> Graphics? <muert0> yeah me dancin naked in a box to your left * microburn quits IRC, now.
<@drift_nax> i had 2 options <@drift_nax> close the porn <@drift_nax> or pull up my pants
<sticker> Scientists have recently dicsovered that most women will, at some time in their life, contain small amounts of intelligent DNA. <sticker> Unfortunately for a large majority of females, this is only a temporary state, as over 95% of them will SPIT IT OUT!!! <sticker> lmao <ShadowHunter> rofl <MrSupreme> rofl, good one <CouldItBe> lmao nice one sticker
MynameisTim <Joins> MynameisTim: Oh my fucking god, I was just whacking off and I have these crazy lumps on my coozer I think they are warts, anyway I'm sitting there ALMOST at climax when BOOM! one pops and coats my face with pus MynameisTim: so what are you guys up to?
<AnGeLcAkE-14fFA>wanna cyber? <shiroi>sure <AnGeLcAkE-14fFA>ok, i move close to u <AnGeLcAkE-14fFA>i start rubbin your chest and unbutton your pants <AnGeLcAkE-14fFA>.. <AnGeLcAkE-14fFA>hello? <shiroi>hmm? oh..er. Yea cool. <AnGeLcAkE-14fFA>u suck at this <shiroi>I suck? You're the one signing on to irc with your asl in your nick looking for a lovelife. You suck at life. <shiroi> You're probably not even a girl. AnGeLcAkE-14fFA has quit IRC. (Quit) <shiroi>Damnit, I'll never get a net gf at this rate :(
<@asym> I bet rob zombie would win the election if he came on TV and said "elect me or I will open the gates of hell."
<Mark_Ryan> those of you using mIRC, for a neat trick, hold
down shift and click the "#wikipedia" button up the top
<Slowking_Man> I'm betting that closes it.
<Mark_Ryan> nah it does a 3D animation
* Parts: neilc (~neilc@61.88.101.19)
* Parts: squash- (~squash-@051.b.005.mel.iprimus.net.au)
("Leaving")
* Joins: squash- (~squash-@051.b.005.mel.iprimus.net.au)
<squash-> it works on xchat too
(Deranged): I wanna get a job in a candy store putting fudge into boxes. (Deranged): That way, when people ask what I do for a living, I can say I'm a fudge packer.
* Now talking in #crimehackerz * Rozatoare has left #crimehackerz * Algene has left #crimehackerz * Marmotele has left #crimehackerz * AgeaMu has left #crimehackerz * Pistolu has left #crimehackerz * Soarecu has left #crimehackerz * Smirnof has left #crimehackerz * Hotomanu has left #crimehackerz * Armamentu has left #crimehackerz * mulmisor has left #crimehackerz * cr|st|na has left #crimehackerz * Papilon has left #crimehackerz * botulet has left #crimehackerz * SandyBel has left #crimehackerz * Holtei has left #crimehackerz * Pucioasa has left #crimehackerz * aiurea`` has left #crimehackerz * Mumata has left #crimehackerz * Aiure| has left #crimehackerz * Bergen has left #crimehackerz * Saramura has left #crimehackerz * Olitza has left #crimehackerz * Zorrro has left #crimehackerz * Sugheci has left #crimehackerz * Lammers has left #crimehackerz * Hashtura has left #crimehackerz * Mig21 has left #crimehackerz * F22Raptor has left #crimehackerz * Pentium3 has left #crimehackerz * Cozonacu has left #crimehackerz * Nokia3330 has left #crimehackerz * Popeye has left #crimehackerz * Pentium1 has left #crimehackerz * Handicap has left #crimehackerz * Spanacu has left #crimehackerz * Socheres has left #crimehackerz * Musonu has left #crimehackerz * DevilBoy has left #crimehackerz * Costa has left #crimehackerz * Aslistu has left #crimehackerz * D-White has left #crimehackerz * oala has left #crimehackerz * Orbinson has left #crimehackerz * Pansament has left #crimehackerz * Cutteru has left #crimehackerz * Indianu has left #crimehackerz * Bulanu has left #crimehackerz * Aslista has left #crimehackerz * Gunoiu has left #crimehackerz * alifie has left #crimehackerz <snoldak> im so lonely
<PacerX> i made a kid stop crying today <bemyfreak> awww, how sweet <PacerX> i knocked him unconcious <bemyfreak> WHAT
<janelle> i hate guys <PacerX> hey, people can piss me off too, but i don't write off their whole gnder <PacerX> that would make me a feminist
<blanco> chicks dig ignorance <blanco> but only as long as do it with an accent
mojo: oh my god that was the greatest ever mojo: UPS guy was at my door delivering some stuff to me mojo: and this guy from across the street was on the sidewalk talking to him about a cell phone delivery or some nonsense mojo: and the UPS guy says "crazy foreigner from across the street keeps bothering me, i don't even think he has a house" mojo: "he probably drives a taxi because he can't get a real job" mojo: and i smiled at him and said "yea. nothing at all like driving a UPS truck." *SLAM*
<NightShade> hey Bamihap, lets do a singalong :D <NightShade> The internet is really really great <Bamihap> FOR PORN <NightShade> i got a fast connection, so i dont have to wait <Bamihap> FOR PORN <NightShade> there's always some new site <Bamihap> FOR PORN <NightShade> i browse all day and night <Bamihap> FOR PORN <NightShade> its like surfing at the speed of light <Bamihap> FOR PORN <Bamihap> WHY DO YOU THINK THE NET WAR BORN??? <Bamihap> PORN PORN PORN!!!! <herr_flick> roflol <NightShade> I'm glad we have this new technology <Bamihap> FOR PORN <NightShade> which gives us untold opportunity <Bamihap> FOR PORN <NightShade> from your own desktop, you can research browse and shop <Bamihap> FOR PORN <NightShade> untill you want to stop <Bamihap> FOR PORN <Bamihap> ALL THESE GUYS UNZIP THEYR FLIES <Bamihap> FOR PORN PORN PORN <herr_flick> lmao!!! <Bamihap> SO GRAB YOUR DICK AND DOUBLE-CLICK <Bamihap> FOR PORN PORN PORN!!!! <NightShade> o.m.f.g. :D <Bamihap> sorry shade, we masturbate ;)
R0ry » what shall i get my bro for his bday R0ry » he's 25 bazmalti » an anal probe? bazmalti » lol R0ry » i said 25 R0ry » not german
DarkNeo: Pedophilia is like golf, DarkNeo: you hit for the lowest you can DarkNeo: It's all good till it gets to 18, DarkNeo: then the fun stops.
::: Joins: STRAUSS (Simmons@Kitchener-HSE-ppp3578448.sympatico.ca) (STRAUSS) hey how do i change my quit message (@Seriph) /quit message (STRAUSS) ty ::: Quits: STRAUSS (Simmons@Kitchener-HSE-ppp3578448.sympatico.ca): Quit: message ::: Joins: STRAUSS (Simmons@Kitchener-HSE-ppp3578448.sympatico.ca) (STRAUSS) ban Seriph!
<dragman> Did you know the legal age of consent in Canadia is 14? <lockdown!> Interesting...all i need now is a cheap flight and some deodorant <lockdown!> I think Hollands has a low consent age as well <dragman> Hehe. You go that way, I go this way and we meet in the middle. Highest kiddy total wins £20 <lockdown!> The game is on
<MoonlightShadow> I'm exhausted and as a result of that, sick <BlueTicona> pms moon <MoonlightShadow> I do not have pms! <BlueTicona> no <BlueTicona> i mean pm's
<SJEZealot> You know your car is slow when it has a blue circle with the letters F-O-R-D in it. <Zoomzoom123> At least they circled the problem.
<berkley> that was wierd <angled-diamond> berkley: what was? <berkley> i walked into my friend's dorms room, and it was empty. but the computer was on, and it showed some chic getting it in the ass. so i closed the door and dropped my pants. midway into wacking off and i noticed something <microfform> ? <angled-diamond> ? <berkley> there were no girls...and u know whats sad? <angled-diamond> that you finished jerking off? <berkley> ...yes
<underground> someone grabbed my ass today in physics <Ludvig> that's not too bad either <Ludvig> unless it was a guy <underground> ...i go to an all boys school